Dieting From The Inside Out
- Oct 18, 2022

Make Weight Loss SUSTAINABLE ft. Carter Good | Dieting from the Inside Out Ep.238

In this episode, we have a very special guest episode—and a very good friend of mine—Carter Good.

Carter has been coaching for about the same amount of time as me, but before he started coaching, Carter had his own weight loss journey, losing over 140lbs on his own.

One of the most interesting things about Carter is that he lives his life in a way that is not super conducive to fat loss. He travels, goes to music festivals, and has managed to keep his weight off for over five years.

I wanted to have Carter on the show because I know he will have a lot of great information on not only how to have your own transformation, but how to live your best life and maintain that transformation sustainably.

Often, after we lose weight, we find ourselves trapped because we're afraid we won't keep it off. We stop going out and having fun, but it doesn't need to be that way—and Carter is a prime example of this.

I know you'll enjoy and get a lot out of the variety of topics we cover in today's episode.

TIMESTAMPS:

(00:00) - Introduction

(01:03) – Our sponsors

(03:58) – About today's episode

(06:13) – Catching up with Carter

(09:20) – About Carter Good

(11:47) – Expectations and mindset

(16:09) – Balancing lifestyle and weight loss

(28:07) – Boundaries, habit change, and intercommunication

(35:08) – Honesty with yourself and changing your goals

(49:08) – Where to find Carter

(50:27) – Closing thoughts and how to sign up for coaching

Transcription (click to open)

EP#238: Make Weight Loss Sustainable

. 238 Carter Good

Download 238 CARTER GOOD • 135KB

ft. Carter Good (Lessons Learned from Losing 140+ Pounds & KEEPING it off)

0:00:12.0 Jared Hamilton: What's going on, friends? Welcome back to a brand new episode of Dieting from the Inside Out, where you're never gonna struggle losing weight again, 'cause that's what we're about here. Welcome to the show. My name is Jared Hamilton. If you are new to these parts, I'm really grateful that you're here. I am in catch-up mode like crazy right now. I've been in the busiest travel schedule lately, if you've been following me on social. I think I'm traveling six... I'm sorry, four times in six weeks, and that's a lot for me, and I have friends who travel every week, but four times in six weeks is a lot, so that's kinda like what I've been doing. If you wanna keep up with that, just follow my Instagram stories. But anyway, I am grateful for you in that you're here. Yeah, welcome to the show.

0:00:54.0 Jared Hamilton: Now, today, we have a really cool, cool podcast planned with a very special guest that I'm sure you guys are not going to be new to. He's kind of a big deal, so... But before we get into the goods, I want to have our official sponsor section of the show. So mass thank you to... Mad... Wow. I... Words, I guess. Words are hard today. Anyway, mad... Thank you, mad props to the sponsors of the show. Big thank you to FlexPro Meals for keeping me all sorts of taken care of, because part of this game, with being traveling all the time and schedules being unpredictable and things being all over the fucking place, meals are all over the place, literally; like, I'm so out of my routine, it's unreal. So having an a fridge full of FlexPro Meals, keeping things cheaper than fast food, but on point with my goals, and letting me spend my time not cooking and preparing and just doing my thing, and then I'm just like, "Oh, I need to eat."

0:01:46.5 Jared Hamilton: Microwave, done, and I'm good to go. And it's in line with my goals. It just makes times like this way simpler and way easier. So, huge thank you to them. If that's kind of your cup of tea and you're like, "Yeah, I don't have time to do anything or cook or even eat right, or by the time I do get home from work and overtime and soccer practice and school and whatever," and you just need something like that, I'm telling you, you should absolutely check out FlexPro Meals. They're way more affordable than you think. I think they have meals as low, with my discount, as under $7 a meal, which is half the price of fast food. I went through Wendy's the other day, and I was like, "$14 for a meal? That's just stupid."

0:02:23.7 Jared Hamilton: Anyway, definitely check that out in the description, or just go to flexpromeals.com. But if you use my code, it not only supports me, and I thank you for that, but it also saves you a lot of money; saves you like 20%, so definitely check out that.

0:02:36.1 Jared Hamilton: Other sponsor is 1st Phorm. Again, I'm always rocking the 1st Phorm shirt because they're comfy as fuck. But huge thank you to 1st Phorm. Guys, you know that supplements are not everything, but they absolutely have their time and their place. Again, with me being all over the place with traveling and school, or not school, or not school, work stuff being crazy, schedule being nuts... My stuff has not been where it should be, or it's just way harder to make it where it should be, so having things like... Whether it be my vitamins or my protein powder and what have you just makes things easier. Like, I'm not sleeping as well, inflammation is higher, taking things like fish oil and my joint stuff, it just makes it easier having a little bit of grounds taken care of on that stuff, so it's a big deal. If you're not sure where to get started with supplements, I actually have a YouTube video below, so you should check that out.

0:03:20.0 Jared Hamilton: But otherwise, if you want some free shipping, because who likes paying for shipping now? Amazon kinda fucked us all over on that one. We all know none of us pay for shipping, so then when a company is like, "Oh, yeah, shipping," it's like, "Why are you doing that?" Definitely check out the link below, because I have a free shipping link down there. But otherwise, that's it for the show. Be sure you're subscribed. If you're not also watching this on YouTube, what the fuck are you doing? If you like to watch your shows and not just listen to them, I'm really pouring into YouTube as well. I'm gonna be making some medium-form content there, 'cause right now, on my YouTube, I have either super short-from content, like YouTube shorts under a minute, or really long-format stuff, which is like the podcast here. So, definitely check out my YouTube, and be sure and subscribe if you like to... If you'd rather watch the show.

0:04:00.0 Jared Hamilton: But anyway, let's get into today's episode, 'cause I'm super excited. So today, I'm interviewing a very good friend of mine. His name is Carter Good. So it's... His Instagram handle is @cartergood. But he's been doing the online coaching thing around the same time as me, I believe. But his channel exploded back in the Instagram infographic days. His account took off. He's kind of a big deal in the sustainable weight loss space and in the Instagram space. He's a great dude. Great, great dude. And the things I wanna get Carter on and talk about is a couple different things, 'cause Carter has lost over 100 pounds on his own before he started... Before he started his coaching business, but lost over 100 pounds on his own. So, right out the gate... So right out the gate... Sorry if you can hear... I feel like I just heard a chainsaw. My neighbors are doing something with chainsaws next door, and I'm like, I didn't hear them chainsawing for a couple of hours. I'm like, "Okay, maybe I can record this real quick," but either way, we're gonna keep rolling.

0:04:56.9 Jared Hamilton: But... Anyway, Carter is a great dude, and he's not only lost 100 pounds on his own, but Carter also... This was the biggest reason I wanted to get him on, 'cause he's lost over 100 pounds and kept it off for the last five years, so that alone is a big deal. A lot of value there, a lot of tactics and gold nuggets there. But here's the thing: Carter's life, like, lifestyle is not conducive for weight loss. It's not like... If you see how much he travels and see how... Like, the foods he eats, and sees how... Like, he loves alcohol and has this pretty... Like, going to music festivals or whatever; like, his life and day-to-day is not very conducive for fat loss, but that motherfucker has been able to keep his over 100 pounds off and live his best life in not a fitness-y way that you would be thinking for most people.

0:05:41.2 Jared Hamilton: So it's actually a really, really good conversation, and I think you'll get a lot of value on it, on how to not just have a life-altering transformation, but also how to live your life and actually experience your life, 'cause too often, we lose weight, and we become trapped by the one thing we thought we wanted. Like, how many times have you lost weight, and then you're like, "Oh, my gosh, I'm so terrified to keep it off," and then you end up not going out and not enjoying your life and things like that? So that's what we'll get into today. So I will shut up now and get... Move on to the clip where Carter and I are actually having the interview. I love you. Be sure to stick around for the whole thing. You'll wanna stay for the end. I will talk to you in a second.

0:06:15.6 Jared Hamilton: So how are you, dude? How are things? I feel like it's been so long since we've actually talked.

0:06:19.2 Carter Good: I know, man. Things are going well. Still kicking it down here in Austin. Life-wise had some bigger changes, but business-wise too, I guess, I think everything's changing. Business definitely in a good direction. I think we're in a similar boat where we reached the point of having to make a decision on, alright, where are we taking this? Right? Are we gonna have to scale it or are we gonna have to figure out your own systems? And so it's been challenging, obviously some different roles, like leadership role now is definitely interesting. Something that's like, was never really my forte, I would say still not necessarily my forte, but it's a necessary part of the process if you're trying to scale yourself. So...

0:07:00.1 Jared Hamilton: Yeah, absolutely. It's been cool watching your progression over the years, 'cause did... I think you and I got started around the same time-ish, right?

0:07:08.6 Carter Good: Yeah.

0:07:09.2 Jared Hamilton: And then it's been super cool watching from a distance how your stuff has grown and where it's at now compared to where it was. It's just crazy, bro.

0:07:19.7 Carter Good: Yeah. Dude, no, it's nuts on all on all sides. Yeah. It's actually funny, me and Matt McLeod were talking about the... There's a subset of coaches who started around the era whenever, like Mike Vacanti and Jordan Syatt were bigger and we've worked with Syatt, right? And so it's just funny how there's a small pocket of us who have obviously gotten to the point now where we're pretty... We put in the work and been pretty successful with it and stuff. But, yeah, we've all followed a similar path of growth.

0:07:48.9 Jared Hamilton: It's super cool and 'cause it's crazy to see, 'cause a lot of the other people that started when we started, they've fallen off, they have normal jobs and you gotta do what you gotta do. But the small pocket of people, like I can only list a small handful like you, me, McLeod, a few others that we all kind of got to know each other back, like was that 2016, 2017...

0:08:10.7 Carter Good: 2017, 16-17. Yeah.

0:08:13.0 Jared Hamilton: Yeah. It's just crazy, man. Back when Instagram... Instagram infographics was the kick. [laughter]

0:08:20.4 Carter Good: The thing. Yeah.

0:08:24.8 Jared Hamilton: Yeah. Well, now Instagram's not even technically a photo platform, their CEO said, "We are now a video platform." And it's fucking crazy. But now the question is, when are you getting on TikTok is the question.

0:08:35.0 Carter Good: Hey, I'm there now.

0:08:35.8 Jared Hamilton: Are you there?

0:08:36.6 Carter Good: I'm hosting some stuff now. Yeah.

0:08:37.9 Jared Hamilton: Okay.

0:08:38.2 Carter Good: I've been getting more into it. Again, it's definitely been a bigger switch for me. You're pretty natural on camera and you enjoy it. It's not my favorite way of communicating content, but obviously you go where things are are moving towards. So I haven't posted more on TikTok and stuff. I haven't got a lot of traction there yet, but I'm basically doing, like everything I make is basically so it can fit on reels, TikTok and shorts on YouTube.

0:09:03.8 Jared Hamilton: Yeah, it's funny. People will ask me, other coaches will ask me my tactics with all, with how I do content. There's so little tactic, I'm just... I wanna vomit everywhere.

0:09:13.7 Carter Good: Yeah.

0:09:14.6 Jared Hamilton: I'm... If I can make it a video, it's going everywhere and I don't give a fuck. And that's my content strategy, but I love it. Well, for those of you that may not, for those people listening that may not know who Carter Good is, do you have your little mini, like who the fuck you are and why they should listen to you.

0:09:31.1 Carter Good: Yeah. So similar to Jared, I run an online fitness coaching company, a big creator. So I have a pretty big following on Instagram. That's where I got started with coaching, just posting free content and went the whole route of working with people one-on-one online. And Jared, I think you and I are, our messages align pretty similarly...

0:09:52.6 Jared Hamilton: Yeah. 100%.

0:09:53.2 Carter Good: Around how we approach fitness and how we wanna work with people and how we wanna help people.

0:09:58.4 Jared Hamilton: Yeah.

0:09:58.7 Carter Good: Create a positive change. And so, for me it started... I used to weigh... So I got into fitness back around 17 years old, I think. So I used to weigh over 300 pounds. I had a huge weight loss transformation, lost like over 140 pounds at... To get to my lightest weight at the time. And probably similar to you, Jared, I did everything the wrong way, right? I had tried and failed every diet up to that point. And then even when I lost weight in the beginning it was one of those situations where I found something that worked, but it was super restrictive, unsustainable, unenjoyable and had to work backward after losing around a hundred pounds to figure out, "Okay, this isn't gonna work long term."

0:10:36.0 Carter Good: And that's what drove me into doing a lot of my own research and reading and learning about nutrition and all this to get me to a point where once I discovered flexible dieting and this other approach to fitness, it felt like this need to... I need to tell everyone about this, right? I think more people need to understand this. And so that's where it's all been fueled from, and I've been doing that since about 2000, like we said, 2017 and 2018.

0:11:00.8 Jared Hamilton: I love that so much, dude. I think people who don't have that much, people who are trying to lose 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 pounds going from that to what was your big weight? Was it right over at a hundred or was it a hundred something?

0:11:15.0 Carter Good: So I lost... So my heaviest weight that was recorded, 'cause I have one of those scales that would keep track of your weight.

0:11:22.5 Jared Hamilton: Oh, yeah. [laughter]

0:11:22.6 Carter Good: So it was 305 pounds on the scale. And then my lightest weight I ever got to was 158 pounds.

0:11:28.2 Jared Hamilton: That's crazy.

0:11:29.5 Carter Good: But no muscle or any... I looked like a skeleton. I was unsustainably lean, 'cause I was so obsessed with getting the six pack and doing all that.

0:11:38.1 Jared Hamilton: Sure.

0:11:38.1 Carter Good: But that was kind of my biggest gap. I sit around 180 right now, 185. So the biggest weight was 145 pounds, basically.

0:11:47.3 Jared Hamilton: And that's the thing is for you is especially whether from your perspective of going through this yourself and then how you teach it now with clients, is there a different headspace side, a headspace in mindset side of this going from like, "Oh, shoot, I've only got 20 pounds to lose versus I have easily 120 pounds to lose." Is there a massive difference for you from the expectation headspace side of that long of a journey?

0:12:11.3 Carter Good: Yeah, I think expectations, for sure, right? And definitely setting realistic expectations for people. Because again, if you have 20 pounds to lose versus 120 pounds to lose, I mean, mindset stuff aside, right, that's inevitably gonna be a much different length of a journey to get to wherever you're going. But I think that if somebody comes to me, whether they have 5 pounds to lose or 120 pounds to lose, there's basic mental shifts that have to happen regardless. 'Cause what I always do is, I'm really big on just reverse engineering the process of like, okay, let's think of the dream outcome of who you wanna be, how do you carry yourself, what's your relationship with food, how is exercise incorporated into your life?

0:12:49.9 Carter Good: Helping them paint this picture of this dream outcome where they wanna be. And then we work backwards, so for the person who needs to lose 20 pounds, the journey might be shorter, but I'm still going to want to get them to lose those 20 pounds in a way that's already setting them up for success once they've lost it. And the same thing with the person who has 120 pounds to lose.

0:13:08.8 Jared Hamilton: It's interesting, I wanna stay on that. I think most people don't ever set a dream outcome. One of my biggest things is I see so many people, I always fuck up when I say this, they make the process the goal, they don't... 'Cause if we think about it, weight loss, losing 50 pounds is the process to the goal over here, it's like we drive to get to Disneyland, but you don't get excited about the drive, you get excited about Disney, but I think so many people get stuck in this place of, "No, the goal is to lose 50 pounds," and they forget like, "Well, no, that's the process to the goal of the dream outcome." Do you find people have trouble like, "Oh, I've never thought about what my dream outcome is."

0:13:48.5 Carter Good: Yeah, well, just really quickly 'cause it's ironic that you said that, 'cause yesterday I made this post, I said, "Pro tip: Your goal isn't to lose weight. Your goal is to eat better and move better so that you can feel better or look better and be better in other areas of your life. Weight loss is just a side effect of these changes that lets you know you're moving in the right direction." So...

0:14:05.6 Jared Hamilton: I love that.

0:14:05.8 Carter Good: Right along with what you're saying. I think that people get... 'Cause it's hard because the reality is if you have 120 pounds to lose, you're gonna lose weight, and if you're not losing weight, something's not clicking, right? But it is difficult to get people to shift their thinking of weight loss as that is more of a way of telling you that you're on the right path versus making it the goal itself, and it is a hard mindset for people. I think... And funnily enough, I think it's actually more difficult for people who have less weight to lose, because the people who have 120 pounds to lose, it's just more so from a mechanistic standpoint, they're gonna lose weight more easily especially in the beginning because there's a lot of things that they're gonna lose weight really quite fast.

0:14:45.6 Carter Good: But if somebody has 10 to 20 pounds to lose, the reality is it's like there's gonna be weeks they don't lose weight, there's gonna be moment... It's gonna be... And so, I often find that those are the clients who are often more weight-obsessed and struggling with getting over that more than anything else just because they've been telling themselves these 20 pounds is the problem, we need to lose these 20 pounds.

0:15:06.5 Jared Hamilton: No, it's interesting you bring that up, 'cause I would totally agree with that. We'll have clients that have a visible six pack, but they're like, "No, I have to get veins going up my abs," or like, "Oh, my gosh, I've... " Or they're scared to take a maintenance break or a diet period or I'm sorry, a diet break or a maintenance period because they're like, "I can feel myself getting fat," as you can still see the striations in their obliques versus the person who has a 100, they're like, "I just wanna feel better and don't really care."

0:15:36.1 Carter Good: That's the biggest thing. 'Cause the person who has that much weight to lose is having a lot more things restricted in their life from just enjoyment of life, quality of life than the person who just has 20 pounds to lose, 'cause there's probably a good chance that maybe they're 20 pounds overweight but they're not... That doesn't... They're not significantly overweight, it's not having a major impact on their health in this very moment. So sometimes, it's harder to get motivated or it's harder to focus on those things because there's just less significant changes in a rate of time, so you're definitely right there.

0:16:07.6 Jared Hamilton: No, absolutely, absolutely. So I was wanting... One of the things I was wanting to ask you on here, 'cause I think one of the reasons I love your story so much is not only have you had the stupid transformation and you've kept it off forever, but then you also don't have the most optimized fitness life, like between travel, running a business, having a relationship, having friendships in somewhere like Austin where there's always stuff to do, you're going out to eat, margaritas, the whole nine yards, so for... But you've kept your weight off forever. [laughter]

0:16:42.1 Carter Good: Yeah.

0:16:42.3 Jared Hamilton: You know what I mean? It's been years you've kept your... You haven't regressed and gone back to 305 Carter, so what are some of the keys, if you will, not to sound fucking like a Hallmark card, but for you, what are some of the keys from that, from yourself and that you teach your clients to do that, to keep the weight off, but also like most people that we see, they'll lose the weight but now they're trapped by their own success, now they wanna live in a hole because they're scared of gaining fat again, but you've been able to not just do that, but you live a great life that's not very fitness optimized, so how... Talk about that a little bit.

0:17:16.3 Carter Good: Yeah, so there's a couple things that come to mind there. One is going back to what we were talking about with expectation setting. And the reality is... So to people who are listening, I'm a fitness coach, but I joke around and say that like, "But I'm not a fitness person." I... Fitness is a part of my life, it's not my whole life. And if anything, being a fitness coach has made me less... I almost don't like that as much as I used to because it's all I ever talk about.

0:17:42.3 Jared Hamilton: Absolutely. [chuckle]

0:17:43.6 Carter Good: But in saying that, what I've had basically with myself become okay with, is the reality is if I'm going out to eat as frequently as I do, drinking alcohol, traveling in this, I have to be okay with the fact that I am not gonna be able to be as optimal from a physique standpoint and from a muscle-building standpoint as I could be. And for me, the switch came whenever I had an honest conversation with myself and realized why am I doing this. And I actually realized at one point I actually don't care to be the most... I don't care about having a clear six pack. It's not... It's actually not as important to me as I thought it was.

0:18:19.0 Carter Good: I think it sort of for a while as fitness coach, I was thinking I need to be in the best shape 'cause people won't wanna work with me if I'm not. And I was stuck in this thing of like I've made so much of my life about fitness, I needed to keep dialing in that and I need to make all my life choices be around that. But I think when I gave myself the permission to be, "Hey, it's okay to be 15 pounds heavier, you're still in a healthy body weight range, if anything, maybe healthier."

0:18:48.3 Carter Good: And it gives me the freedom to be able to do these other things. So I think that's the biggest thing, is are you okay with not being as lean as you possibly could be because of the lifestyle that you live? And so that was a big thing I think mentally. But then as far as keeping it off, and everyone's different, but I'm a big rule person. I like to have rules with myself that... Not necessarily from a place of restriction but just from a place of holding myself to a certain standard on things.

0:19:16.2 Carter Good: And so for example, if I know that I'm going out to eat one day, I'm already setting myself up for success before I go out to eat. Maybe it's like on a day like that, I will follow more of a fasting approach where I have... I push a meal back or whatever, I'll get my workout in ahead of time, I'll already... For me, the biggest thing is, definitely what got me to be over 300 pounds was just food in the house, just snacking. I'm a late night snacker, and so for me, I just don't keep things in the house.

0:19:47.5 Carter Good: I always get pushback against that from people who say like, Well, I don't wanna do that. And my big thing with teaching people moderation, which is kinda something you have to have if you want to maintain your success, is you can't have moderation until you've proven to yourself that you don't need something. And so people are trying to create moderation after not having any moderation, and it's like doesn't work that way. And for me, I've recognized there are just things that if they're in the house, they get consumed.

0:20:12.2 Carter Good: And so for me, the best approach is just to not have those things in the house, or if I do bring things into the house, it's like a smaller package, and I have it and then it's done, and so... And there's a ton of different small things that I do like that. But a lot of it's just creating an environment where it's easier to stay on track and I don't have to rely on willpower all the time, knowing that I have a lot of moments whenever I am going out and splurging and not worrying about it.

0:20:38.5 Jared Hamilton: I love that, man. I think it's interesting, the self-awareness piece of that is so underrated, 'cause none of what you said is like... You never said certain things are bad, you never said like, there's certain foods you can't have free-for-alls with, you never said that like, oh, I shouldn't have Oreos. But you also bring up a point that I know for me that if it's in the house, it's gonna get eaten. And I don't wanna work hard and have... I don't wanna work... Have to... The harder and have to max out my discipline muscles in willpower. I would just rather not have it there, and if I want it, I have to go get it. And I think that's so underrated.

0:21:16.7 Carter Good: Well, and people don't realize, we live in a... Our biology hasn't changed much since... What's changed a lot is our lifestyles and the amount of stress that we're encountering on a day-to-day basis. And you and I both, as business owners, we live stressful lives. And having these things in the house are just gonna add more stress already. So I already know I'm in a vulnerable situation, knowing that by the end of the day, I'm pooped and I'm tired, and if there's food in the house, I'm gonna reach for it. And so I purposely don't... That's why I don't keep them in the house 'cause I know that I will have them. It's just a matter of time. And like you said, it's not that these things are bad, it's not that I can't have these things, it's more just understanding myself and knowing that, Hey... And there are certain things that... There's... Halo Top has these... I think they're called Halo Pops, they're these little ice cream bars.

0:22:04.8 Jared Hamilton: They sent me some. Yeah. I know, I'm...

0:22:06.6 Carter Good: Oh, really?

0:22:07.0 Jared Hamilton: I think it was either Halo Top or Quest had... I know exactly what you're talking about. And they sent me some. Yeah.

0:22:10.2 Carter Good: Yeah. Well, I... Those are things that I love to have in the house, because they're individually packaged and they're not things that I'm like, I'm gonna eat all six of 'em now that come in the box, right?

0:22:20.2 Jared Hamilton: Right.

0:22:20.9 Carter Good: Whereas if I have... I used to buy these huge family-sized peanut M&M's that have a zip and everything.

0:22:25.8 Jared Hamilton: Bro, those are dangerous.

0:22:26.0 Carter Good: I was literally so... I would slam them like it's no one's business. And so, yeah, I think it's like I've found things that I can have that I don't struggle to control. And then the other things I just don't have in the house, or once a week, I'll grab them and have them. But, yeah, I think it's a matter of just not making these things so accessible is really key, I think.

0:22:49.3 Jared Hamilton: I totally agree. One of my favorite habit books, I'm sure you... I think you may have read it. Have you read Atomic Habits, James Clear's book?

0:22:55.2 Carter Good: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

0:22:57.7 Jared Hamilton: And I actually just made a post on this, is the concept of just whatever is out in the ordinary and not hidden, you're gonna do. If I wanna get really good at guitar, I should probably have it in the living room and not in my closet. Actually, I gave this analogy. So I play drums. I don't know if you know. You know that I play drums?

0:23:15.0 Carter Good: Yeah, I think so. Yeah. I think I've seen a video or something.

0:23:17.6 Jared Hamilton: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So at my old house, my office or our garage, it's what it was, my drum kit was out in the garage. A lot of my older videos, you could see it behind me. At our new house, it's in the basement. Well, my studio where I'm recording this is in the upstairs. So for me to go to my drums, I have to go down one set of stairs into my living room with my wife and my dogs and all that, and then I have to go down a second set of stairs, all the way to the basement that doesn't have anything else in it, other than storage and my drum kit. So I would play my... I would, at my old house, play my drums almost every other day. I'm between calls, I'll play something real quick, just having fun.

0:23:53.9 Jared Hamilton: We've been in this new house for probably six months. I haven't played the kit once. Just because it's out of sight, it's out of mind. It's not out in the open in the obvious, so... But I love how you worded that with your stuff where you're just like, I just make it harder to get to, less accessible. It's easy to smash a whole bag of chips or a whole whatever, versus it's harder, even if it's in the house to those individually wrapped ice cream pops. You have to like, Oh, wow, I have to undo six of these to binge on them, or then I have the awareness of, Oh, I really ate six of them, versus unconsciously just hitting a tub of ice cream.

0:24:26.5 Carter Good: Yeah. No, exactly, man. And then another tip with that too, I take a lot... Some pushback I get with that is like, Well, I have a spouse, and... Who wants these certain things too. And so something I'll do, and me and my girlfriend, Julie, she has no issue. She'll eat seven chips and be like, That's all I needed, and put the bag away. And so it's just a completely different mindset. But what we'll do is, and this sounds so... I know it sounds silly saying this, but I think it's important to first recognize that these foods are engineered to make them irresistible. It's not you. It's the foods.

0:24:58.4 Jared Hamilton: Hyper-palatable. Absolutely.

0:25:01.9 Carter Good: So understand that. It's not like you have a problem. It's like this... As a human being, your body is craving these things, even though you don't need them. And so what we'll do is instead of buying a bunch of stuff all at once... So she's like... Julie loves salt and vinegar chips, and I do as well. But one of us can have it every once in a while, and one of us will eat the whole bag. What we'll do is we buy one bag, and it's established that those are Julie's chips.

0:25:29.6 Jared Hamilton: I love that.

0:25:30.7 Carter Good: So they're in the house, but if I eat the chips, it's like...

0:25:32.7 Jared Hamilton: You're eating Julie's.

0:25:33.2 Carter Good: I'm eating her food. And it's like... You know what I'm saying? It's kinda like having a roommate in that I kinda treat it almost as if you have a roommate and that's their food. And that for me is enough. I'm like, It's gonna be weird if I just eat all of her chips and now she doesn't have any left for later. So that's why I don't eat them. And so, again, it can sound weird, but having that conversation with her and being honest, saying, You understand how I am and I can't have these certain things, and so... Or I just don't personally like to have them. And so creating those labels, even, of like, this is yours, this is mine, works really well for us.

0:26:03.7 Jared Hamilton: Well, it's funny, I haven't talked about it in a while, but I would... I bring that up on more of a one-on-one conversation level, 'cause moms that have their kids and their kids eating all the stuff. And they're like, How do I not? I go, That is little Timmy's chocolate. That is not mommy's chocolate. If mommy wants chocolate, the gas station is down the road and mommy can go get her Snickers bar, but you do not eat Timmy's chocolate. That's their food. And 'cause I think it's interesting, I think some people, like when you said you get some pushback on this, I think because like at the end of the day, like one of the biggest things that I preach is like all about food relationships and all of that kind of stuff, where we're like making things from the inner game as good as possible. And I think people out the gate would be like, this is, this is not good. But I think I would go so far to, I would bet your relationship with food and the overall effort you have to put into this is the best it could probably ever be.

0:26:52.4 Carter Good: Yeah, no, for sure. Right. And I think it goes back to like the, I don't feel like I'm not allowing myself to have these things. It's more I've just made these concessions with myself knowing myself, right, and I just, stick with that. And we do this in all kinds of other areas of our life. People who can't get out of bed, they realize like, okay, I need to put my alarm on the other side of the room, right, versus just like whatever it is. And so it's understanding, I guess the goal is like understanding what you're good at and doubling down on it and then understanding what you're not as good at. And then instead of like fighting it, like finding ways to limit I guess the impact of what you're not as good at, right.

0:27:29.5 Jared Hamilton: Yeah. Well, I love that so much, 'cause we hear the conversation around boundaries with other people, right? Like if you have a, let's say your ex, like an ex-wife is kind of toxic and tries to be manipulative, we put boundaries down. Or like you have that friend who is, takes advantage of you or whatever. We talk about boundaries. I mean, hell, we have a lock on our front door for a reason, because it's for people who don't want to, who don't like it there, right? Like at the end of the day, boundaries are for people who don't like them there, but most people totally sacrifice their own wellbeing in different cases because we're not willing to have boundaries with ourselves. I think that's... Like to simplify everything that you've said is you've just had self-awareness and you put boundaries in with yourself and then you hold that standard. You know what I mean?

0:28:10.2 Carter Good: Yes. No, absolutely.

0:28:12.3 Jared Hamilton: For people, do you have anything along those lines for people who are really bad about holding the boundary or that standard with themselves, right? That it goes back to like, well, I know what to do, I just don't do it. Like, do you think that's just a, they don't want it bad enough kind of conversation? Or do you think it's deeper where if someone's like, No, I set these boundaries for myself, I say I'm gonna start over Monday and I don't, or I say I'm gonna not eat the whole bag of chips or I'm gonna portion it in baggies, but then I just eat the whole thing and I don't care. Do you have anything you handle with that?

0:28:41.3 Carter Good: Yeah, so I mean, kind of touching on what you said about like not wanting it enough. I think that's at times a thing, but I think oftentimes it's kind of goes back to the place of like, listen, like habit change is hard, and like, I think you and I both probably have several things that we say we want do, but we never do them, right?

0:28:57.3 Jared Hamilton: Without a doubt.

0:28:58.2 Carter Good: And so I think it's first like giving yourself some grace in that and saying like, listen, it's not uncommon for this to be a, like a problem, right? And so doing that, then I think if you've established that like this is important to you, right, which I think is still an important conversation to have. It's, I'm not like a you just don't want it bad enough kind of person.

0:29:16.8 Jared Hamilton: Yeah.

0:29:17.1 Carter Good: However, I do think some people haven't had an honest enough conversation with themselves to really say, am I in a place where I'm actually willing to create the sacrifices needed to do this? But assuming that that has been in place, I think one of the best things that you can do is... Creating accountability with yourself is hard. But, or having discipline with yourself is hard. But one way to work around it is to create accountability with somebody else, right? And obviously with coaching, that's what you get there, but it doesn't have to be coaching in that scenario. It could be having that conversation with your spouse who should be on your side, right. If they're not, that's another problem to address.

0:29:51.6 Jared Hamilton: That's a red flag.

0:29:51.8 Carter Good: Right? Something else we gotta work about, but like, like being okay with being honest with important people in your life who wanna see you succeed and telling 'em, Hey, this is what I struggle with. Because the problem is if you just rely on yourself, like it's gonna be really hard to like stick to it unless you have like this, you're like one, you know, one-track mind...

0:30:10.8 Jared Hamilton: This David Goggins vibe to you.

0:30:11.6 Carter Good: Unless you're Goggins energy, right. But most people aren't gonna be that way, right. And 'cause they're too busy and they have all these things going on. I think it's really important to speak with the people who are in your immediate environment, who are around you, people in your house, and explaining how important your goals are and asking them to help you in that. And to like, and even like, you know, with, you know, Julie, even like, she has full permission to like if, in different areas of life saying like, Hey, you know, you told me that you want me to help you with this and like she has like full, what is the word? Like...

0:30:51.1 Jared Hamilton: Permission to call you out on it.

0:30:52.1 Carter Good: Permission. Like, call me out on it constructively 'cause we're on the same page. I think that's where some people are like, you know, and I've told her that she can do that versus getting mad at her when she does it. 'Cause I literally told her to, right. People have to be, I guess, embracing of accountability and like willing to take it too. But I think that's that's huge. It's just making it bigger than yourself, especially while you're developing discipline in the beginning.

0:31:12.2 Jared Hamilton: I think that's an interesting point to bring up, where I see so many people, like we see this with clients a lot, where they're like, well, my husband this, my kids this. And they're, they're talking about it from like, it's a really hard thing. Like, well, I have these goals but my husband just does this or says this or I need want this and my kids do this, this and this. And I just go, "Have you actually had an adult constructive conversation and communicated this?" And they go, "Oh, well, no." And I go, "You married this motherfucker. Do you think he would be receptive if... " 'Cause I can tell and I can...

0:31:41.7 Jared Hamilton: And I'll tell them, "I can tell you right now, him saying that, I know it doesn't feel good, but I bet he doesn't mean it maliciously. I bet he just is unaware because we're all fucking meatheads. So, but I bet if you went to your husband and said, 'Hey, honey, I know you probably don't mean it like this, but this bothers me when you say this about my weight or about with food or, I'm really trying to do better with this, but you bringing this into the house and this facet and just, oh, it's fine. Just it's one meal or whatever it is.' Like, have that conversation and 9 times out of 10 it always goes well. And if it doesn't you're probably married to a piece of shit."

0:32:14.8 Carter Good: That was like saying now it's time to figure out. Now we gotta talk about... Like, actually have a conversation with your spouse and communication.

0:32:23.1 Jared Hamilton: Yeah. But like most people, though, have never had, whatever that struggle is, like if it's another person is involved, having that adult conversation and communicating it with equanimity where you're like emotionally neutral and okay, it's like that solves a lot of the issues right there.

0:32:39.1 Carter Good: Yeah. That's, I mean, that's again, like now we're therapy podcasts, but like, it is like, you know, people I think make assumptions is like one of the biggest problems in relationships. They, I assume that they know this is important to me, but like, you have to remember, even your spouse, like most of the time they're thinking about themselves, right? They're not selfish, but they're self-full. Like they're, they think for themselves. And so like if you are not clearly communicating things, then like, it's not their fault if they are doing stuff. And so, and again, you would hope that like by sharing these things, like as your spouse, they would honor it and respect it. And like, honestly, probably be happy to know what your boundaries are with some of these things and like how whatever they can do to help you.

0:33:22.9 Jared Hamilton: Well, I mean, yeah, I mean, just like case in point that maybe one of those things where like the husband is trying to like, doesn't want you to feel like he thinks you should lose weight. So he's like, "No, honey, it's fine to start over Monday." And you're like, "Why is my husband derailing me?" But like, that's it. It's kinda like the love language thing. Totally unrelated to weight loss. My wife and I recently had this, where we've been going super hard with our communication skills. We started going to couples therapy just to make sure we're on the best level we can. Fun fact, starting levels of therapy while things are good is the best move ever.

0:33:53.2 Carter Good: Yes. I'm 1000% percent on for that.

0:33:55.6 Jared Hamilton: And here's what happened. I'm up here in my studio most of the day, like with work and content and all that. And let's say my wife is downstairs where we live. That's where the kitchen, the living room, the dogs, like all that's at. But I was trying to connect with her by like periodically throughout the day, just popping down there, getting a water, getting some food. "Hey, honey, what's up? Love you," that kind of thing, coming back up here. But I was trying to connect, but because it was such the vibe of my ADHD self going down there, da-la-la-la, and coming back up, it felt very hollow on her end. And looking at it from her perspective, I'm like, "Oh, I could totally see how that would seem very hollow." Like Jared comes down, all fired up, and Jared like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then he disappears. [laughter]

0:34:35.3 Jared Hamilton: And I'm like, I wanna connect with my wife in the middle of the day. But on her perspective, it was very hollow. So it's like, it causes disconnect. But we had a conversation about that and all of a sudden now we have, I know things I can do when I go downstairs to make sure she feels connected. Maybe I need to take an extra five minutes, Maybe I need to talk, actually ask her how her day's been, instead of just telling her how my day's been or whatever. But we didn't know that. We both thought we were doing the right thing, but it turned out there was some friction there. But now things are great because we communicated and I think so many issues around weight loss and the spouse can be solved in the exact same way.

0:35:11.8 Carter Good: Exactly. No, you're a 100% right.

0:35:14.4 Jared Hamilton: I'm curious, I know you mentioned it earlier. I just got my brain rolling after you said it. That's how like my weird brain works, is you'll, like, we'll be talking about something then, part of my brain's off over here, like dissecting it, then I'm like, "Oh, hey, I wanna talk about that again." When you said that you had to have that honest conversation with yourself about, you know, do I, I don't think I want, what I think I want anymore. Did you find there was this internal resistance or almost like a weird judgment on yourself for like, you wanted to be the shredded six pack Carter. And you got the, and then like, now you're like, I don't think I want that. I'm gonna stay healthy and in shape and, but I don't like, want the thing I thought I wanted anymore. Was there any like, disconnect around that?

0:35:54.5 Carter Good: Oh, for sure. And I think it goes back to people get attached to their own identities of who they think they are. But like, I don't think people don't realize they're, who they are now is not the actions that they take or stuff, even their goals is not necessarily who they actually are. And so for me in that process, it was a moment of like reflection on, can I be okay with my goals changing? 'Cause that's okay too. And like, you know, people grow, people change their minds. People have different priorities in their life. And so for me, I think it was a matter of like being able to make the... 'Cause I think that the reason I was so resistant to it for so long was because it felt like I was being lazy or that like, I was no longer sticking to the goals I set for myself.

0:36:44.7 Carter Good: But you know, the more like journaling and just like reflection on it, it's like realizing, Oh, wait, it's more just the fact that I had just shifted what's important to me in my life, and that's okay. And so I think whenever that aha moment happened for me, that's when what made it a lot easier and kind of got me just away from being so obsessed with appearance and like those things. It was a matter of like learning to be okay with changing my mind and moving into a different direction. I think people get really sucked into like, this is who I am, I have this job, I do this thing, and then that's it. And like, they're scared of like changing things. I think a lot of it's like sunk cost fallacies in there. Like there's a lot of things around, like they just create an identity and then they just keep trying to live in that identity, but never like, have a reflection with themselves on like reviewing, is this still my goal?

0:37:34.5 Carter Good: Is this still what I'm trying to do? And if it's not, like it's important to change that. 'Cause then you're just gonna... 'Cause for a while it just came, I was even struggling to get more results because there was so much resistance around I thought that I needed to do this thing, but my actions didn't line up with it. And I almost, and I had some like insecurity around, like, I'm a fitness coach and I'm not even able to stick to my own goals right now of getting leaner. And then I had to realize, Oh, wait a minute, it's because like my goals have changed and like, that's okay. And that's when I felt like, and it's funny how even whenever I did that, like I even lost some weight after that and got like leaner just from like taking the pressure off...

0:38:12.6 Jared Hamilton: Just releasing that.

0:38:12.7 Carter Good: And trying to reach a goal that, yeah.

0:38:15.3 Jared Hamilton: It's interesting, like we see that with clients a lot. The ones that are most obsessed about the scale, as soon as they quit giving a fuck about the scale, it drops. Or like, we have some people that we work with who, like, let's say whether... This isn't our average client, but like they, let's say they used to be a competitor or they used to be like a really, like a big athlete, or they got like stupid shredded, like fucking ab veins to their... From their like groin to their face, like super, super shredded. And then now it's like, Oh, I've gotta like undo all this, not undo it, but it's like your metabolism's fucked, it's not healthy. It was disordered when you did it. And then coming out of that and they're just like, I don't know how to like... I don't know how to let go of this mental hurdle.

0:38:56.8 Jared Hamilton: Does that ever happen with some of your people, like with the people you work with who... They know that they've lost their period, their hair's getting thin, they know they need to come out of that, like reverse and maintenance and restore all that, but there's so much resistance. Do you ever see that a lot?

0:39:11.0 Carter Good: Oh, yeah. I mean, I think that's... Again, it's on both sides, of both being way too lean and knowing that they need to do more versus people who haven't been honest with themselves about how much they've been eating and all these things too. Yeah, and the thing with those situations, and I'm sure you know this too... I mean, that's kind of where the art of coaching comes into play...

0:39:29.7 Jared Hamilton: [laughter] Yeah, absolutely.

0:39:30.4 Carter Good: Because there's... There's never one... There's never a lookalike in those situations, 'cause it's always a deeper meaning, and it's normally they've attached some type of worth around achieving that goal. It's big with athletes, because athletes have always been taught to like, "You have to work hard to reach this goal, and that's what you have to do." And they tie their worth to reaching a goal versus tying their worth just in existing, of who they are, right? And so yeah, it's really tough, and honestly, that's where I think you throw fitness aside a bit, and you start to think, "Hey, why are we putting this much pressure on ourselves to look this way?" or like, "What's the... What is this? What is this getting us? What happens when we get to this point?"

0:40:15.9 Carter Good: And I'll often have exercises with clients where I have them... Let's say that you got ab veins, all that. What happens then? How does that make your life better? In what way... It's getting them to think about, like, less about the result and more about the feeling that they want from the result. And then from there, working backwards and thinking, okay, well, is doing that the best way to get that feeling, or can we get that feeling a lot easier just through doing some personal development stuff as well?

0:40:45.2 Jared Hamilton: Right, absolutely. I think being able to reestablish who you are and what your identity is and having all of that not caught up in your aesthetics... Not that there's anything wrong with your aesthetics, but I think having your identity caught up in something that can fluctuate like that is dangerous.

0:41:01.7 Carter Good: Yeah. Very much so. It's funny; you talked about people having resistance with reversing or maintenance or anything. I've had lots of situations where... You know, whenever I've begun a client, oftentimes, I like to start them a little bit more aggressively from a motivation... It depends on where I feel like they're at mentally, but I often find being a little bit more aggressive in the beginning helps with... Just because they're coming to me to lose weight, and so I don't want them to come to me as a client and I say, "Okay, we're not gonna lose weight, we're gonna do this instead," because then they're immediately gonna get demotivated. It takes some time to build that trust.

0:41:33.1 Carter Good: But what I've often done with people is I've started them more aggressive, and then I basically said, "Hey, so now we're gonna take a break." And during this break... Like, once I've built some trust with them, and I've shown them, "Hey, I can get you results, now let me... " They'll trust me even more. I've had clients who could definitely keep losing weight, but I said, "Hey, I actually wanna take a month and not lose weight, only because I want you to see... I wanna help you get over this need to always be making progress and things," and that's not necessarily, you know... They're coming me to lose weight, and now I'm telling them to do this, and sometimes, it's like a harder transition, but normally, they trust me by that point, that I would do that, but I think it's important for people to... Sometimes, like, "Hey, what if we stopped working towards that goal, just temporarily, because it's really stressing you out right now? And then we can always come back to this goal, because it's... You can always lose more fat. It's not one-way, right?

0:42:23.8 Jared Hamilton: Absolutely. [laughter]

0:42:24.8 Carter Good: The thing is, it's not changing. It's not like this is your one chance, and how can I get you to a headspace where you'd be okay if you didn't lose any more weight even, right? Or like... And that's when we can start maybe focusing more on why they're eating certain foods, like, making healthier choices and stuff, and then diving back into weight loss when they're in a better place mentally.

0:42:42.8 Jared Hamilton: For sure. I think there's... One thing I've been leaning into a lot is... This is... I've been actually having to really reaffirm this with myself, not just like... For me, it's not really fitness-related, it's other areas in life, but I've been doing this with a lot of our weight loss clients, which is reminding them once you get there, you're gonna wanna be somewhere else immediately. At the end of the day, it's like coming up in business. At first, the goal is, "Alright, let's make 50 grand." As soon as you make 50 grand, it's like, "Well, I wanna make 100 now." As soon as you make a 100, it's like, "Well, I wanna make 500 now." Well, then it's like, "Oh, I wanna make a million now," and it's like... Not that there's anything wrong with setting big and outlandish goals, but there's also something to be said about as soon as you get there, you're gonna wanna be somewhere else.

0:43:22.6 Jared Hamilton: So as soon as someone gets those ab veins, you're now gonna be dissatisfied, and you're gonna wanna be somewhere else. You're gonna wanna get even leaner, where... It's actually where I first heard that. I can't remember what it was for. It was actually on a commercial. It was on a Hulu commercial, where it was this robot bartender in this weird universe, and there was one guy at the bar, and he goes, "Alright, bartender, lay it on me. What's your best piece of advice?" He goes, "I bet, right now, there's somewhere else you would rather be. But I bet if you were there, you would find somewhere else you would rather be. So your life is a perpetual state of you wanting to be somewhere not where you are." And I'm like, I'm trying to enjoy my lunch, and Hulu's getting... And Hulu's hitting me in the face right now. You know what I mean?

0:44:11.3 Carter Good: Yeah.

0:44:11.4 Jared Hamilton: I think there's something to be said for that.

0:44:13.2 Carter Good: Well, and I think too, especially comparing fitness to business, fitness, I think, is an even more difficult thing, 'cause with business, it's like, you can keep growing and growing and growing, and so there's a lot of people who I think are addicted to business, and it's very socially acceptable, 'cause it's like, you know, whatever.

0:44:32.9 Jared Hamilton: Hustle culture and diet culture is the same thing. [chuckle]

0:44:35.0 Carter Good: Right, yeah, but I do think one unique thing about fitness is that eventually, it's gonna reach a point, like it's gonna... Success is gonna be whenever fitness is like an automatic part of your life, so it's adding value, and it doesn't... You don't always necessarily... Like, I'm at a point now where I don't really have any fitness goals outside of making gym progress, but even the rate of progress I'm making in the gym isn't so important to me that it's... You know what I'm saying? And so, I think that's what gets really hard for people is like, you're gonna reach a point where you don't have a next goal with fitness other than just maintaining and just kind of now enjoying the fruits of your labor, right, and staying there. 'Cause that's what can be tough. And that's why I really work on that stuff while we're losing weight, right?

0:45:24.0 Jared Hamilton: It's so important.

0:45:24.9 Carter Good: And teaching people to be okay with slower progress and even taking these breaks whenever they want to take breaks and like, encouraging it because, you're right, it's hard because like you're gonna reach that goal and it's ultimately not gonna feel satisfying enough if all you've ever cared about was getting to that point, you know?

0:45:41.9 Jared Hamilton: Well, it's interesting, when you said that teaching people to enjoy the fruits of their labor, we do the same thing, but I find that's actually where we get some of the most resistance, because it goes back to that whole like, once you get somewhere, you're gonna wanna be somewhere else. 'Cause how many times do you hear, "Hey, you're down, like your inches are losing." "But my scale isn't down yet." Or, "Hey, you lost 33 pounds in the past few weeks." "Well, but my clothes still don't fit." Or, "Hey, you're half, you literally are down to... You're officially your first 30 pounds." "I've still got 80 to lose." And it's like, it goes back to most people I think just flat out deny any of their progress. So then when they get there, if the whole journey over the course of the last year they've denied, denied, denied, it's not good enough, I should be further ahead. I'm still a piece of shit. Then they finally get where they want to be and they're like, Wow, I was happier when I was fat.

0:46:30.2 Carter Good: Yeah. Well, I think too, I think people naturally like... Especially with weight loss, 'cause there's probably a lot of negative motivation coming into the reason, 'cause that's the reality. People are negatively motivated to lose weight, right, most of the time, right? It's their doctor said that they're gonna die if they keep doing what they're currently doing. They feel, they don't have confidence in themselves. Like it's very rare for someone to come to me who says like, "I'm actually really happy right now and like, I just wanna show myself love and keep doing this." It's like never that, right?

0:47:00.8 Jared Hamilton: No.

0:47:00.9 Carter Good: And that's why I think people focus so much on the negative of stuff like, "Well, I haven't lost enough weight or I haven't dropped enough inches." And it's hard. I mean, it's... You know, it's kind of where like, the hard part about fitness is like really getting people to switch out thinking of, it's like, like making it less goal-oriented and more like lifestyle-oriented is definitely the hardest part. And, really I think the only solution to doing that is time, right? 'Cause you're, I don't think you can never tell somebody, 'cause you can say it all day long, but until they feel it and they like see it for themselves, it's never, it's never gonna happen.

0:47:37.4 Carter Good: And that's why I think it's so important as a coach to, throughout the process, like throwing in, sprinkling in these long-term... This long-term kind of thinking throughout their weight loss journey, right? And even after a client loses weight, I always say now, losing weight isn't the goal. That's just the first leg of the race, right? Now, it's this other process, you know? So yeah. It's a challenge. Yeah, for person to person, you know?

0:48:05.9 Jared Hamilton: Well, I think a lot, I think to be honest, half of the people, it has to be forced, because you can't get over the fear of heights without being scared. You can't learn to be patient without impatience. You can't be... Learn disciplined without, not wanting to do the thing. It's why, it takes no discipline to kill a whole pizza 'cause it's a lot of fun. You know? It's to get the thing that we want, in most cases, I find like if someone's scared to eat cookies, priority number one is eat the fucking cookies. You're scared to go maintenance, let's go maintenance. You're scared of heights, let's get on the ladder, 'cause we can't, in no world can we get the one without the other. So...

0:48:42.6 Jared Hamilton: Yeah, no, you're a 100% right in that.

0:48:44.6 Jared Hamilton: Man, dude, this has been fucking fire. I can't believe we've already blasted through 45 minutes. That's crazy.

0:48:48.9 Carter Good: Oh, shit, have we really?

0:48:49.7 Jared Hamilton: Yeah, dude. Hell, yeah.

0:48:51.3 Carter Good: Oh, damn.

0:48:51.7 Carter Good: This is so good. I think last time we did a podcast I was in a closet on my phone. I'm like, Hey, what's up, Carter?

0:48:57.5 Carter Good: Were you using a... What was that app called? Anchor? I think is what we were doing...

0:49:02.5 Jared Hamilton: Well, it's funny, 'cause I still host in Anchor. I just record everywhere else. Anchor's still cool for hosting, but I record into a bunch of other stuff. But yeah, so man, dude, this has been fucking fire. I really appreciate you doing this. Where can people find you when they're like, Yo, I like this Carter vibe. So where's that bastard at?

0:49:20.8 Carter Good: Yeah, so right now Instagram's really the main one. I'm not on Jared's level yet of conquering all the platforms yet.

0:49:27.4 Jared Hamilton: I'm not on that either.

0:49:29.9 Carter Good: Yeah, hopefully soon. Yeah, soon, though, soon, though. No, there's a podcast on the horizon of things, but right now the best place to follow me is on Instagram. If somebody's like interested just in learning maybe more my philosophy, which again, if you go through my stuff, you're gonna be like, this is me and Jared are very aligned in what we talk about. I think a good place to start is if they go to leanerforlife.com/fast... I'm sorry, wrong URL. Right URL: it's, we actually, we got our ad account hacked and so like, we can't use our main domain. It's this whole process right now.

0:49:58.7 Carter Good: But so everything's moving over to my personal website right now. So if you go to cartergood.com/fast-track, it's just like an email course, seven days, and basically just in the seven days you're gonna like learn a lot about my story and then you know, the sort of the switch that happened, the mental switch, and like talk about how I now approach fitness and how I do it with clients. And so if anyone's interested, I guess in just learning more of the philosophy I have, that would be a good place to kind of get a good summary of it all.

0:50:28.0 Jared Hamilton: I love it. Man, dude, this has been fucking great. I really appreciate you doing this.

0:50:31.5 Carter Good: Yeah, dude, thanks so much. This is awesome.

0:50:32.9 Jared Hamilton: Of course, man, I'll talk to you soon.

0:50:35.8 Jared Hamilton: And we're back. What a episode. I know if you stuck around for this long, you got a lot of value out of the podcast and I know you've got some gold nuggets that you're gonna be able to take to the bank and really apply to your own situation. And that's, that's my whole intention with this, guys, is I just want you to be able to take this information and have some aha moments and go change your life and thrive and live to the best life that you can. And if you don't know how to do it on your own, that's what we're here for. Like literally I just want you to go, you know what, if it's time for me to get help, I want you to come back here, and that's my goal. So with that being said, though, there is a lot of stuff for you in the description.

0:51:06.6 Jared Hamilton: So number one in the description is all of Carter's contact information. If you're like, yo, Carter's dope, I wanna reach out to Carter and start following him. If you do, reach out to him and be, like, yo, I heard you on Jared's podcast. I heard you on Jared's podcast and just flood his DMs, that'd mean a lot. But then also I have a few other things. Number one, because you're a podcast listener, and I have a special place in my heart for all podcast listeners, I have a special coaching offer. If you're like, Fuck, I need help with all this and you want us to help you, then you can apply for coaching down at the link below. And it's really cool, because I'm gonna give you a whole bunch of shit for free. So I'm gonna give you like $4,000 worth of stuff for free just because you're from the podcast.

0:51:40.4 Jared Hamilton: I have a lot. I'm not gonna get into what all of it is, because I want it to be a surprise, and you're gonna be like, Holy shit, I can't believe you're giving that away for free because I was on the podcast. So if you apply for coaching, then assuming you get accepted, 'cause again, we only work with people we know we can help and we only take on take a certain amount of clients per month that we can actually onboard into coaching, so, definitely apply below and then, assuming you get accepted and things go well with that, then I have like $4,000 worth of extras for you that most people pay for. So that's down below.

0:52:09.8 Jared Hamilton: And then you also get to go to the front of the line because you came from the podcast. So, when a bunch of people apply for coaching and like we said we can't take everybody or whatever the case is, like you're at the front of the line because you came from the podcast. So definitely check that out. If you're like, fuck, let's do this. Just hit it, schedule a call with my team. That way we can make sure things are a good fit. Then we can talk about the possibility of working together.

0:52:29.3 Jared Hamilton: But then I also have other free stuff for you. I have... If you don't have a home base, if you don't have a place where you can go to to get loved on, get support, get help and get information, then you'll wanna join Fat Loss Simplified. It's my free Facebook community. It is your home base, and I promise if you like this kind of content, you'll love it there, but definitely wanna join, the link down is below. Wow, why is it hard today? The link to join is below. Then I also have my Fat Loss Check-List. It is my free five-day course.

0:52:54.0 Jared Hamilton: So let's say you're brand new to my content. Let's say you're brand new to like, I don't even know where to look right now. I have a resource for you. I have a five-day email course where I walk you through all of like the A-Zs of weight loss. Get you to unlearn all your old bullshit, show you what actually matters. And you're gonna go, "That's all I needed. Are you kidding me?" And that's down there below. You'll want to go through it. And also if you're not following me on my other socials, you'll wanna do that as well.

0:53:16.5 Jared Hamilton: But otherwise, I appreciate the fuck out of you. I will talk to you... I'll talk to you in the next episode. I don't know why my mouth is not cooperating. Sometimes my brain and mouth are just spatting and don't get along. But anyway, we're this one-take wonder here. We're not cutting this. Otherwise I love you and I will talk to you next time.

[music]

Episode Synopsis

About Carter:

Carter runs an online fitness coaching company. He got started on Instagram, creating free content. He and Jared have very similar messages and approaches to fitness.

Carter first got into fitness when he was 17. He weighed over 300lbs and lost more than 140lbs. Unfortunately, when he first lost weight, he was on an unsustainable, restrictive system. Realizing that he wasn’t going to be able to maintain his weight loss, Carter dove into his own research and discovered flexible dieting, and wanted to share that with others, leading him to start coaching around 2017.

Today, Carter has had a lot of changes, especially in business—choosing a direction for his business and how to scale.

Expectations and Mindset:

When it comes to coaching, Carter has his clients consider their ideal outcomes—who they want to be, how they incorporate exercise, how their relationships with food is, etc. Having his clients paint this dream outcome better allows them to work toward their goals in a way that sets the client up for success, and gives Carter the opportunity to prepare them for the length of their weight loss journey.

Carter finds that there are certain mindset shifts that need to happen—no matter the amount of weight that someone has to lose—and that part of what people struggle with is the idea that weight loss is a byproduct of taking better care of themselves—eating better, looking better, and feeling better.

He also finds that clients who have a lower amount of weight to lose, like 20lbs, can have a harder time letting go of the idea that the weight is the problem as opposed to those who have a significant amount to lose, like 120lbs, since the person who has more weight to lose health and/or enjoyment of life is often negatively impacted by their weight.

Jared similarly notes that his clients who have further to go are often coming from a place of just wanting to feel better.

Balancing Lifestyle and Weight Loss/Maintenance:

Going back to expectation setting, Carter knows that with his lifestyle, being able to go out to eat, drink alcohol, travel, and generally enjoy his life, he won’t be able to be as optimal from a physique standpoint.

For a time, Carter believed he needed to be in the best shape, but he came to realize that he could be 15lbs heavier, be in a healthy body weight range, and do the things he wants to. He didn’t need to be as lean as possible to be happy and successful.

Carter is also a big fan of rules. He knows that if he is going out to eat, he can set himself up for success beforehand by doing things like working out ahead of time or taking a fasting-type approach.

Carter also understands that one of the reasons he got to 300lbs was simply accessibility—keeping food in the house.

A simple solution for him is to not keep certain foods around that he knows he does not have good skills of moderation with. If he does want a particular food, he will buy a small package, have it, and then it's done.

The goal is to create an environment where you can be successful, especially knowing that he has those times where he just goes out and doesn’t worry about his food.

None of these foods are bad. Knowing yourself, knowing what you can be moderate with, and fostering the right environment for yourself is key to success.

Snack foods are hyper-palatable, and another approach he finds useful is to mentally label certain food items as belonging to someone else. For example, he and his girlfriend both love potato chips. His girlfriend can eat a few chips and be satisfied, whereas Carter is likely to eat the whole bag. So, when there are chips in the house, they are “his girlfriend’s potato chips” and he does not eat them because they don’t “belong” to him.

Having honest conversations with your spouse or significant other, and establishing those rules—or if you have kids, simply labeling those snack foods as belonging to your kids—is a viable tactic.

As Carter points out, the goal is to understand what you’re good at and double down on it, as well as understand what you’re not as good at, and find ways to limit the impact of those things.

"Most people totally sacrifice their own well-being because they're not willing to have boundaries with themselves." - Jared Hamilton

Boundaries:

Carter believes that giving yourself some grace surrounding these habit changes is integral to your journey.

Habit change is hard and, while in some situations a lack of motivation may be a factor, oftentimes you just need to have an honest conversation with yourself about whether or not you are in the right place to make the necessary sacrifices to accomplish your goals.

If you are in a place where you can make these changes, creating accountability and discipline with another person can be immensely helpful to keep you on track. Coaching is just one example of how you can do this. You can also have these conversations about your goals and struggles with those close to you, like a spouse or significant other, and ask them to help you.

Having someone who can constructively call you out can be very helpful. Jared finds that often having these conversations with a spouse or significant other, telling them that you need them to not bring certain foods in the house, or to not say “X” about your weight, 9 times out of 10 goes well because they want to help you.

Fitness Coach Carter Good and his quote about aligning actions and goals with personal identity.

"People get attached to their own identities of who they think they are, but they don't realize that the actions they take or even their goals aren't necessarily who they actually are." - Carter Good

Changing Goals:

When Carter evolved from wanting to be the shredded, fitness coach, to being Carter, with a balanced lifestyle, he had to take time to self-reflect on how he felt about his goals changing, and if he was okay with that.

People grow and evolve, their wants and needs change, and that’s okay.

Carter was able to learn to be okay with moving in a new direction. Carter finds that people often get stuck in their identities and become scared of change. Carter was that way also, but when he released the insecurities he had around being a fitness coach and needing to look a certain way, he was able to recognize that his goals had changed and take pressure off himself.

Jared and Carter see this with clients all the time—they need to come out of a diet or need to be honest with how much they are eating, their worth is tied to a goal. Carter often has exercises with clients and asks them to imagine how they would feel reaching X goal, and determine if that feeling is something that can be accomplished through things like personal development instead of this goal that they have become attached to.

Carter often starts clients out a little more aggressively losing weight and then has them switch into maintenance once he has established some trust with them to help them break out of the need to always be progressing toward a stressful goal and work them toward a headspace in which they can be okay not losing weight.

Jared points out that once you reach a goal, it’s inevitable that you'll want to be somewhere else.

Carter has found that something that is really difficult for people is when they get to the point where they no longer have fitness goals. It becomes about maintaining and it’s something that he works with clients while they are losing weight. It’s important to learn to be okay with maintaining, making slower progress, or taking breaks. Goals are often not satisfying when you reach them if it’s all you’ve been working toward.

Jared finds that sometimes people just deny progress while they are making it.

A person will have lost inches—but not weight—and be dissatisfied, or will have lost 30lbs, but simply think, “well I still have X amount to lose,” and when they finally get to their goal weight, they realize that they were happier before their weight loss because they have denied themselves those victories throughout the entire process.

Carter has observed that for most people, their motivation for weight loss comes with a lot of negative motivation—they feel bad about themselves, they have health concerns—and that negative motivation is part of why they deny their goals.

One of the only solutions is getting a person to realize that it’s not about a goal, it's about creating a sustainable lifestyle and finding enjoyment in the process.