How Tori Escaped Diet Culture & Learned to Love Food Again (with Coach Sydnee) | DFIO 280
About Today’s Episode:
Welcome back to the show! Today we're interviewing an amazing woman named Tori.
Tori is a client and I wanted to bring her on the show to share her story of how she has broken free from all of the diet culture nonsense.
Tori was training for hours every day. She thought she was stuck with a 1200-calorie diet and restrictive programs like Weight Watchers. She felt so much anxiety and fear around food that she felt like she wasn’t able to live her life.
That’s not sustainable. That's not the way to do it. That's where Tori was coming from.
Now, she has gone from chasing skinny to chasing strong, which has led to her losing even more weight and body fat and keeping the weight off—and she's not afraid of food anymore.
I wanted to bring Tori on the show so you guys can hear all this directly from her—from someone you can relate to—because I know it’s not the same to just hear me telling you guys this stuff.
I’m really excited about this one! Let’s get into it!
TIMESTAMPS
00:00 Intro & About Today’s Episode
2:51 Sponsors
4:58 About Tori
8:50 Sydnee’s Approach with Tori
10:30 Overcoming The Fear of Eating More
15:33 The Most Impactful Part of Tori’s Journey
17:15 Tori’s Progress and Mental Shift
22:04 Why Tori Signed Up For Coaching
23:36 How Sydnee Worked Through Tori’s Fears
29:52 Dealing With The “Old Self”
31:18 What Made Tori Invest In Herself
38:01 What Has Made Tori So Successful
41:36 What’s Next For Tori and Closing Thoughts
45:55 Outro—Freebies & How to Apply for Coaching
Transcript (click to expand)
DFIO280 Tori and Sydnee
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How Tori Escaped Diet Culture & Learned to Love Food Again (with Coach Sydnee)
0:00:00.0 Tori: Food would give me anxiety. I would get so anxious. Even during meals, I would get scared to just eat a meal. I would think about what I was eating when I was eating it. If I was eating too close to bedtime or too early in the morning, I would think about all these things that just don't matter. I'm happier now. I love food now, and I just... I didn't like food back then, so it's just such a difference. It's crazy.
[music]
0:00:27.1 Jared: What's going on, friends? Welcome back to another episode of Dieting from the Inside Out, because we all know outer work without inner work doesn't work. And I'm so pumped to come to you with today's episode because of a very, very special story. We're interviewing an amazing woman named Tori. And Tori has done such an amazing set of things. And just to give you a little preface to show you what you're about to learn is, with Tori, her big thing is she just broke through and broke free from all the diet culture nonsense. So looking at my notes, for her, she broke through the 1200 calories. That's where she thought she was stuck, but we got her through that. She broke through the restriction of Weight Watchers. I think before we started working together, she was doing... I think she said she did Weight Watchers for like nine months, something crazy like that, and was able to break away from that and actually be able to go and live her life. She was training for hours and hours a day like crazy. You guys know how the game works, is when you are engulfed in diet culture and you're engulfed in all of the nonsense of the normal societal way to lose weight, it's that stuff. It's you starve yourself, it's you join Weight Watchers, it's you work out for hours and hours a day and brag about how sore you are. But that's not sustainable. It's not the way to do it. And that's where Tori was coming from.
0:01:37.0 Jared: But now, where things are right now is, she went from chasing skinny to chasing strong, which ironically made her lose more weight and lose more body fat and keep the weight off. And it's crazy when you just make those little mental shifts. She's not afraid of food anymore. She went from being scared shitless around eating more and eating certain foods to now is completely free from food. But then at the end of the day, and this is where it messes with most people's heads, is she's now been able to eat more while getting stronger and while losing weight continuously.
0:02:08.1 Jared: Imagine that. Imagine you're there sitting... And like how weird this sounds. You're sitting there eating 1200 calories, can't lose weight, and then someone like me or my team says, "Hey, let's increase calories and the weight's gonna come off more and you're gonna fix your entire relationship with food and get really strong." Well, that's what happened with Tori. So instead of me telling you all the ins and outs of it, I wanted Tori to come on here and tell you her story and tell you how she was able to do this. So this way, you can take those tactics and strategies and run with them and change your life forever. See, these client episodes are some of my favorite because it's not me telling the story, it's them, the client, in their own words and in their own experiences, telling you how it is so it resonates and hits home with you more. That's what we're getting into in today's episode of the podcast.
0:02:51.6 Jared: But before we do, big thank you to the sponsors of the show. Sponsor number one is FlexPro Meals because it is, is with your food, making everything convenient is how is rather helpful. So for me, I don't know about you, my life is all over the place. And I don't even have kids or anything like that. I can't imagine how crazy it is for your parents. But it's why so many people end up going through drive-throughs or stopping into gas station and spending all this extra money on convenience with food that's not really helping them. So the nice thing with FlexPro is you have all these meals in your fridge on deck ready to go. So if you need to just have a grab and go, or you're between meetings or between errands and you just need to grab some food and get out of the house, it's there. But it's also really good tasting. It's really healthy, and it's really good for your goals, because it's all dialed in for the purpose of your goals, like building muscle, getting stronger, and losing weight. So if you're into that kind of thing, you should definitely check out their menu. Flexpromeals.com is their website. If you use my code, HamiltonTrained, it'll save you 20% at checkout. And it's already cheaper than going through fast food. So definitely give that a look.
0:03:52.3 Jared: Second sponsor is 1st Phorm, because we all know, I say it every episode, supplements are not the end all, be all, but they absolutely have their time and their place when you are not getting everything you need from food. If you're not getting enough protein, you're not getting enough omegas, if you're trying to have less energy drinks or take less caffeine, if you're trying to supplement a little because you aren't getting enough fruits and vegetables or micro-nutrients, that's the role of supplements. If you aren't getting it with food and you need it, which we all do, that's the role of supplements. But I wanna make sure your money is going to the right places where you're not just buying dumb bullshit products that aren't accurate on the labels or aren't safe or were made in someone's basement. So that's the nice thing about 1st Phorm, it's literally some of the best supplements that you can buy that's safe. It's third-party tested, the whole nine yards. So if you use the link below, I really appreciate it. It does support me, and it also has some free shipping, some stuff down there as well. But definitely go check out 1st Phorm and what they have going on. If you're not quite sure where to get started with supplements, I do have a video down in the description on basically where to start with that.
0:04:50.6 Jared: But otherwise, let's get into the meat and potato, so to speak, of the episode with Tori. I know you're gonna get a lot out of it. I will talk to you in just a second.
0:05:00.0 Jared: Cool. Well, we are... I think we're recording. So we're good. Cool. Well, dope. Thank you both, ladies, for doing this. Very much appreciate it. So just before we get into all the goods, just so everyone listening has context, Tori, give a little bit of your life before coaching, before things started changing, just like how bad shit was basically. [laughter]
0:05:19.8 Tori: Yeah. Okay, so I don't even know where to start. So before coaching, so I was a grad student. I was in college for like six years to be a speech therapist. So I had a lot of things to do. I was very busy all the time, and I just did not take care of myself. Like I didn't focus on food. I always said I wanted to go to the gym, but I never went to the gym. I never even moved my body for the most part. I just didn't really do much, except study or go to school, come home. I was just not... I was lazy. I would just not do anything, and I just would not really think about myself. [chuckle] I just did not... I didn't put myself first. School came first, and that was it. And then I graduated a year ago, and I was "You know what, I'm gonna join a gym. I'm gonna diet. I'm gonna eat healthy. I'm gonna... " Because I was never... I never grew up an overweight person. I'm very small. I'm like 5'2". I'm 132 pounds. I've never been someone that was "Oh, I need to lose weight or I'm gonna be super, super unhealthy." I was never like that, but I was at a point where I was at my highest weight, which was 152 pounds. That's big for me because I'm very small. Very small frame, short body, very small limbs. [laughter] At my schools, I blend in with like the fifth graders.
[laughter]
0:06:35.7 Tori: I'm very... I'm not kidding. [laughter] I'm very small. So when I would gain that weight, it was noticeable on me, and I would... I knew I had to lose weight, like other people would say "Oh... " my close family. Not friends, but family would say, "Oh, you did gain weight," things like that. So I was "I wanna be healthier, I wanna exercise, I wanna lose the weight." So this was a year before coaching. I graduated, I went on Weight Watchers, and I did that for eight months, eight or nine months. I lost 20 pounds, so I was at that, like 130-132 pound weight. It was tough. I was going to the gym during that time, and I just did not... I couldn't do much in the gym, [chuckle] and I was "Why can't I do much? I'm eating so healthy. I'm eating like 1200 calories a day." I was like...
0:07:28.8 Jared: That's why.
[laughter]
0:07:30.6 Tori: I know. And I didn't know that. I thought that was normal. I was "Oh, someone that has to lose weight has to eat 1200 calories a day." So I was doing that. I was going to the gym, exercising. Exercised... So much. I was probably going like four or five days a week, and I was there for like an hour. Had no idea what I was doing. I was just working every muscle group. At once, I would leave so sore. I remember I told Sydnee this in the beginning, I would leave not being able to walk, [chuckle] 'cause I was so sore. I was just not doing anything right. I had no energy 'cause I was not eating enough. I thought my 50 grams of protein a day was so much. [laughter] So yeah. And then after that, I stopped Weight Watchers after the eight or nine months, and I was "Oh my God, how do I keep this weight off? I don't know what to do. But I'm gonna... " I panicked when I... I deleted my little Weight Watchers app and I panicked, 'cause I was "Oh my gosh, what am I supposed to do?" So I followed you for a very long time, Jared, and then I got contact with Sydnee. And honestly, I believe, I think about this all the time, if I did not go with coaching right after I got off Weight Watchers, I would have gained all of my weight back. 100% like that. Hands down, [chuckle] I would have gained all of it back, 'cause I didn't know what to do. I didn't know where to start, so.
0:08:49.0 Jared: I love that. So for you, because, obviously, coming off of that, right off the gate, we couldn't... Sydnee couldn't just keep dropping calories. So Sydnee, talk about a little bit of your strategy when you got home girl Tori coming in after losing a whole bunch of weight, really short period of time, really restrictive. Your perspective "Oh shit. All right, how to fix that," so from your perspective.
0:09:12.6 Sydnee: Yeah, yeah. What Tori also didn't say is that she was super afraid to even eat more, and so we started off doing... [laughter] I'm "We're gonna have to increase." And I could see her eyeballs get humongous. [laughter] "Yeah, I don't think so." But we started off a little bit slower, and Tori was just the kind of client who was "You know what, I signed up for coaching, I'm gonna go all in." We got her protein. She eats over 100 now. She's eating like 1900 calories a day. And she's down in inches, scale hasn't really moved. And that's the other thing too, is she was super afraid of the scale, and so we worked on that relationship too, and she's doing awesome.
0:09:56.3 Tori: Yeah, it took me a long time to realize that fat loss is in weight loss, so it was just... I always thought that if I... The scale went up, I was "Oh my gosh, I'm getting fat. The fat is coming on my body overnight, 'cause the scale is more than yesterday." I just didn't understand that. So the weighing myself every day has actually helped so much, 'cause I realized it fluctuates daily from so many different things, and I just never realized that. I was so scared of the scale. Terrified, [chuckle] terrified.
0:10:26.3 Jared: Yeah, I love that. I don't love that you were terrified, but I love that, what happened.
0:10:29.5 Tori: Yeah. [laughter]
0:10:30.7 Jared: So I would love to lean into the being scared to eat more part, 'cause this is the thing, is most people that are listening to this that we talk to, they lost... Whenever they've lost weight, it's been because they've done something really stupid or unsustainable, so they're restricted and starving, and the thought of eating calories back is just terrifying. So you struggled with that quite a bit in the beginning, didn't you?
0:10:53.1 Tori: Yeah, it was so tough. I was so scared of certain foods, I just... I was scared of eating more 'cause I really believed that I was gonna gain weight. And I thought that gaining the weight meant that I was gonna look bad and I was gonna look bigger, and I just... I didn't understand that I was eating so little, and that's why I was not seeing any progress, that's why I was exhausted. But there were certain foods that I was so scared of too. I was terrified of pasta, or I was terrified of cheese. And those are my favorite things in the world. Those are my... Sydnee asked me, "What are your fear foods?" I was "Pasta and cheese," and she was "Why?" I was "I don't know. [laughter] I just don't know." Those are always foods that I thought that would make me gain weight, but now I eat them every day, [chuckle] and I'm totally okay with it. So I know it's wild. [chuckle]
0:11:40.1 Jared: Do you remember off top of your head where your calories at now, roughly?
0:11:43.9 Tori: Right now, I'm trying to hit 1900 a day.
0:11:46.9 Jared: Is it weird to go from like sub-1000... Most people on Weight Watchers are sub-1000 calories a day. Is it weird to think like under 1000 calories today, almost doubled and lost inches, is that weird to say?
0:12:01.1 Tori: Yeah, so it's wild. No, it's wild. [laughter] It's so funny, I had a conversation with my mom the other day, and I was "You know I'm eating almost 2000 calories a day?" She was "Are you sure that's okay?" She was "You should weigh yourself. Be careful." She was telling me to be careful. [laughter]
0:12:14.8 Jared: Wow.
0:12:16.1 Tori: I was "No, this is... I'm telling you, I'm looking better, I'm feeling better." And I would have never believed this a year ago, but it's true. And I even tell friends. They're "What are you doing?" And I'm "I'm eating a lot of food. [laughter] I'm just eating a lot. And I've never, ever been able to eat this much. My body is definitely adapted to it over time, 'cause at first, I was definitely really, really full. But I feel like I can just pack the food and [laughter] I can pack so much food and oh my God, it's so insane. I could eat a lot. A little body, I can just eat a lot, and it's great. [laughter] 'Cause they feel great.
0:12:51.9 Jared: Yeah. No, for sure. I love it. Well, and that's the thing, is there's such this belief around small petite women can't eat. They won't even try. That's why I always say, Of course, there are some people who can't eat as much, but that's not the majority. And everyone needs to test it. Test your upper limit. And like you say, you're a very small petite woman, and you're eating almost [laughter] 2000 calories a day, and losing weight. That's a deficit number. That's fucked up. That's awesome. [laughter] So let me ask you this, when it comes to the fear around food and fear around eating, at what point did it not become scary? Was it when you ate more and lost and it's "Holy shit. My world just got flipped upside down," or... When did it stop becoming scary?
0:13:39.5 Tori: It was starting to eat everything I want and then seeing results. I had no idea. I would just... I would restrict everything. I would not eat... Tonight, I had a burger for dinner, and it was in my calories, I hit my protein, everything was fine, I went to the gym every... I don't feel guilty about that anymore, I think it was when I just kept eating what I wanted, I was just eating within my goals, hitting my calories, protein, and then just seeing results, I never... I've really never gotten results from doing anything, but this. I used to try... Years ago, I would diet or go to the gym, and then I would stop for a year or like something. Like I would just go back and forth, but I've never had results like this before, and I'm eating whatever I want, I'm just... I'm eating my... The foods that I love. It's crazy.
0:14:28.4 Jared: Do you feel like a hat's about to drop or like you're getting away with murder? Does it almost feel too easy?
0:14:35.0 Tori: It does. It really does, and I really struggled with that at first. I was there has to be something wrong. Yeah, there has to be something wrong. I'm eating so much food, I'm eating what I love. I have snacks before bed every night, sometimes I have a Pop-Tart, like it's just life is good now. Life is good.
0:14:53.4 Jared: Pop-Tart gang.
0:14:55.4 Tori: Yeah. It's so wild. It's news like that. It's not right, but it is right. It's crazy.
0:15:02.2 Jared: That's the thing, is that's why I like to do these interviews like this. Is because I can say this shit till I'm blue in the face, but everyone's first thing is, Jared, you're a 31-year-old meathead on testosterone. Of course, you're gonna say that. But when I get someone like you on here, it's Oh shit, maybe this is... Maybe this does work. 'Cause that's the thing, is I want everyone to be able to experience this level of ease around this game, 'cause this is how it should be. You know what I mean? This is how the normal should be, not the other bullshit. Let me ask you this, so for you, what part of this journey thus far has been the most impactful for you? What part has been the biggest life-altering for you?
0:15:42.8 Tori: Definitely the relationship with food. 'cause I was just... I was so scared of food all the time, it was terrible, I would avoid going out with friends because I just didn't wanna eat too much or I didn't know what to get on the menu 'cause I was... I didn't wanna get a salad, but I would probably end up getting a salad anyway if I went out because I thought that was the healthiest option that would not make me gain weight. My relationship with food has improved so much that it's like I don't get nervous going out for a night or having drinks or having dessert, I don't get nervous about those things anymore, when that was all I would think about previously. I would be so upset over the weekend if I went out on a Friday night and had dinner with friends and drinks, I would think about it until Monday, or I would go off the rails after Friday and be Oh, I messed up on Friday night, I'll go back on track Monday, and then I'll eat healthy the rest of the week and then eat bad over the weekend. Like I just would not...
0:16:38.6 Tori: Right now, all I do is if I go out and have drinks and I have a meal that I love at a restaurant, I'll get back on track the next day and I'll pretend that that previous night never happened. And that's huge for me 'cause I've never been like that. I would think about it constantly and be Oh, I feel like shit, this is terrible, I might as well just eat bad until Monday and I'll get back on track then. But no, I pick it up the next day and I'm Okay, I ate one bad meal last night, not even a bad meal, I ate a meal that I love last night, and then next day I'll get back on track and hit all my goals and everything's fine, nothing happens. It is what it is now.
0:17:14.3 Jared: I love that. That's incredible. Sydnee, from your perspective, where did it start shifting for her, from the coach point of view?
0:17:21.5 Sydnee: For sure, for sure. She was a little bit afraid at first to increase calories, but I think that the moment that you went all in was around, I think it was like your third or fourth set of progress photos, and you were There's no changes. What in the crap. Da da da da da. And I'm Bitch, look at those shoulders. Your delts are popping out, your back muscles... What are you talking about? It was the whole thing, so.
0:17:47.4 Jared: That's amazing.
0:17:49.6 Tori: Wait. I saw it. I saw it, too. And I was Wait. I do see it.
[laughter]
0:17:53.4 Sydnee: And so I think that's when she really was Okay, I'm gonna lean in. I'm growing muscle by eating this food. And I think that's really that turning point that I noticed when you were like all in. Just, All right, let's do this thing.
0:18:09.1 Tori: Yeah, this sounds so silly, but one of my turning points was sometimes I feel my arm or I'll feel my leg, it will be That's not my arm. That's not my leg. It doesn't like it's my body part. That sounds so weird, but I've never felt like muscle in that area. It's just so funny. It's crazy to me.
0:18:27.9 Jared: Yeah, bu that's the thing. This is how or why most people sabotage this on their own is because you had progress screaming at you in the face, but because of your old conditioning, your brain wasn't allowing you to see it until Sydnee said, bitch, what the fuck? [laughter] Look at your shoulders. Look at your hips, look at your face. There's your collarbone. Yeah. And for most people, it takes someone to... Not saying it's the easiest way to get Sydnee pissed is deny your own progress. And Sydnee gets all spicy. She's like, "bitch, what the fuck is wrong with you?" [laughter]
0:19:00.3 Sydnee: I dunno if I said it quite like that, but...
0:19:04.7 Tori: No, she didn't say it that way but...
0:19:07.1 Jared: She meant it aggressively.
0:19:09.6 Sydnee: Now, you know my inner thoughts, Tori. Yeah. [laughter]
0:19:11.4 Jared: That's amazing. Yeah. You get Sydnee triggered. There you go.
[laughter]
0:19:19.3 Jared: So, is there any other major wins that you've noticed? Or is the big not to deny any of what you've gone through already? Is there any other major air things that you've noticed like that's improved or this changed in this area of my life? Is there anything like that? 'Cause obviously food just transcends everywhere.
0:19:34.1 Tori: Definitely energy. Like I have a lot more energy. I would get tired. Like I still go to bed at... I'm that type of person that goes to bed at like 10 o'clock at night. That's just how I am. Oh.
0:19:42.4 Jared: Oh, you're a Mamaw.
0:19:45.3 Tori: Yeah. No, I am for sure. [laughter] But...
0:19:47.3 Sydnee: Hold on. Are you insinuating that 10 o'clock is early?
0:19:51.8 Tori: It is a little early now.
0:19:54.4 Sydnee: Okay. A little [laughter] And we're just gonna move on. [laughter]
0:19:54.5 Tori: It depends [laughter], but any anyway, yeah I go to bed very early, but I notice that I just have so much more energy throughout the day. I'm not as exhausted. When I go to the gym I feel totally different than I used to. Just having that energy and just being able to do so much more. And I recover quicker too. I'm not super sore like I used to be. Oh my gosh. I remember I told Sydnee way back that I would get sore and be sore for like five days. It was terrible. And she was No. [laughter] That should not happen. And I recover so quick now when I'm sore, I'm sore for like a day. And I know it's because of my diet. It's because I go back to the gym and I'm continuing to work out and I'm eating properly and I'm eating the protein and I'm just feeling so much better. And sleep too. Sleep has improved a lot. I've noticed that I can sleep throughout the entire night. Not that I've ever struggled with sleep before, but I definitely can sleep better throughout the whole night. There's so many things. It's just like I, and I noticed things here and there too where I'm oh, wow, that's different because of my lifestyle now. It's pretty crazy.
0:20:56.9 Jared: Would you have believed me if... Whenever I tell people like that they're inquiring about coaching, I have to be careful how... If you say how I sell coaching, because if I listed, I feel like everything that you just experienced, I bet you wouldn't have believed me. I'm all right, we're gonna double your calories. You're gonna heal your entire relationship with food. You're gonna lose inches with doubled calories and eat out every week, drink alcohol. And your entire life is just gonna be effortless around fat loss. Would you have believed that?
0:21:25.2 Tori: I wouldn't. And it's so funny 'cause I think I followed you... I think I followed you for like a year before coaching. Yeah. And I would look at things and I'd be no, this is not... I'd be No. [laughter] Like this is crazy. And then I that I followed you as I was doing Weight Watchers too. So I was I wanna do what this guy's doing. I wanna learn all these things. And I would just be I thought that it couldn't be me. I always thought it couldn't be me. Or I would see other people's progress and be that couldn't be me. That'll never be me. And it's now it is. Which is wild. It's I would've never believed it. I would've never.
0:22:06.6 Jared: So speaking of that, remind me what what made you then even consider coaching? Like you're 'cause obviously something had to shift to go, okay, now this might be me. What made that happen?
0:22:16.9 Tori: I was just so tired of restricting, like I wasn't getting the results I wanted. And I felt like that restricting was like putting like 100% effort. I was so tired of not being able to eat things I wanted and I was so tired of not having a good relationship with food. And that was where my main problem stemmed from was just the relationship with food. Food would give me anxiety. I would get so anxious, like even during meals, like I would get scared to just eat a meal. It was terrible. I would think about what I was eating when I was eating it. Like it was just like what snack I was eating when I was eating it. If I was eating too close to bedtime or if I was eating too early in the morning. Like I would think about all these things that just don't matter. And I never knew that it could like be like... I'm happier now. Like I love food now and I just, I didn't like food back then. So it was just such a difference. It's crazy. [laughter]
0:23:10.3 Jared: That's the thing is food is food's everywhere. This is why I hate it when fitness assholes are like, "food is only fuel and nothing else." I'm "bro, You ever gone to date night? You ever gone to a child's birthday cake? You ever gotten drinks with friends that you haven't seen?" It's everywhere. And if we can't enjoy that stuff, that means we can't enjoy the experiences those brings and then we can't get the goals that we want. These all have to live in harmony, otherwise we'll never make it.
0:23:36.3 Tori: Yeah.
0:23:36.9 Jared: Sydnee from your perspective, because that's a like a lot on the plate. Like a lot of people who are where Tori was, is in that place of all right, I'm scared shitless of food, I'm everything that Tori literally just said, I don't even know where to begin. So from the coaching standpoint, what was some of your thought processes in fixing that and breaking that down?
0:23:58.6 Sydnee: Yeah, for sure. So there were a bunch of like red flags screaming, she just needs to eat more food. Like she said, she was so, so tired she couldn't do anything at the gym. And so I took into consideration that fear, Hey, we're not gonna just increase you by 900 calories today. But taking those steps, continuing to show her Hey, look at how your energy's increasing. Look at how you're feeling better in the gym. Look at how you're able to increase your weight here. The scale staying the same but you're losing inches. You're feeling better. And so being able to just kind of like point out the progress, but then also kind of explaining like how a calorie is different than nutrients and like how it's okay to eat food if it's a hundred calories of chocolate or a hundred calories of broccoli. The calories, the calorie. So we had a lot of conversations about that. And then just recently, I think, didn't you just have a day where you were like going out and you were afraid to like not track for the day and you did it and we were super proud of you. [laughter]
0:25:10.6 Tori: Yeah. And it was like my, I think it was my first time not tracking for like more than a day. So I didn't track for the two days. 'cause I went away for a weekend and, and I just got back on track when I got home and everything was fine and the scale went back down for what it usually is. And I was okay, we're good [laughter] Like everything's fine. [laughter]
0:25:31.2 Sydnee: Those are my favorite moments when you just embrace it and do it. Like you were nervous not to track. And you just did it and everything was okay. When we keep having those moments, it proves to our brain okay, like nothing bad is gonna happen. We can continue doing this.
0:25:47.5 Jared: This is why what we label in coaching is irrefutable proof. Because what happens is, until you have irrefutable proof, there's part of your brain that isn't bought in yet. This is why like the whole dieting from the inside out concept is if we don't change things from like a neurological neuro-pathway side, nothing's, you're never gonna be fully bought in because your brain only knows what its history is. And if the only way you've ever lost weight is doing stupid things, let's just call it like it is, is doing stupid shit. It's the only way you've ever lost weight is like stuff that's unsustainable or whatever your brain just assumes. That's the only way. Until we get your brain experiencing doing this set of things and getting results and having irrefutable proof, you're never gonna have that like aha moment. So that's like in coaching, our first objective is to get that aha moment and then everything else is a breeze. And that's why you're oh, this is fucking dope.
[laughter]
0:26:45.5 Jared: Yeah. No, everything Now it's just I'm just going with the flow and I'm being patient and it's just, yeah. It's happening. [laughter]
0:26:52.7 Sydnee: It's so fun though after...
0:26:54.1 Jared: Let me ask.
0:26:54.9 Sydnee: Oh, sorry. I was just gonna say it's funny after...
0:26:56.1 Jared: No no, you're good. You're good. Go ahead.
0:26:57.9 Sydnee: [laughter] After the aha moments, because it's like Tori starts bringing stuff up, Hey, I'm thinking about switching from Planet Fitness to going, do you go to Crunch now?
0:27:05.1 Tori: Yeah.
0:27:06.2 Sydnee: Like going to this other gym and...
0:27:09.0 Jared: Hell, yeah.
0:27:09.0 Sydnee: I'm like "heck yeah!"
0:27:11.1 Sydnee: And so I love like when they you start to see those results and you're I want more. I want more. Like I know I could be doing more. And so those are like some of my favorite moments too. When it's not me having to push you, but Tori pushing herself out of her comfort zone.
0:27:25.2 Jared: Was that awkward at all?
0:27:28.5 Tori: It was just because I got so comfortable at Planet Fitness, that was the gym where it was like everything was mostly the same. Like everyone was the same. It was just different. And then when I did start going to that different gym and started like pushing myself to do more and experiment with different equipment and more weight and everything like that, it was very intimidating. I remember I was telling Sydnee, like the Smith machine, I was so scared, [laughter] like that whole I don't know, I was just so nervous to do that. And I do it now, which is amazing. And I just, I keep pushing myself to do more and more and it's just... It's intimidating still. But I've definitely gotten so comfortable and I think of myself as someone that's there and I know what I'm doing now. I used to be that person that didn't know what was going on or I didn't know how to do certain things. But now I do, and I'm experienced and I've been going to the gym for a long time now, and I know what I'm doing [laughter] which is great.
0:28:19.0 Jared: Well, and that's the thing is we can't get that to happen staying comfortable. We have to get uncomfortable to get the results on the other side of being uncomfortable. I did the same thing. I was working out at a little Anytime Fitness that was close to my house and I validated it by me saying, oh, it's close and convenient. It takes me three seconds to get over there. But now I go to a big boy meathead gym. Like every dude in there is on gear. There is IFBB pros walking around. Everyone has veins the size of my arms, let alone their actual arms. [laughter] And first day I walked in there, I said, "I am soft as puppy shit. Holy fuck." [laughter] So I paid for a year in full because all right, we're just getting this over with. And it was intimidating for me and I'm a fucking meathead, but magic comes out on the other side of that and going into the unknown, a little intimidated.
0:29:13.7 Sydnee: Definitely.
0:29:14.9 Jared: Well Sydnee, you experienced that this week. You went to...
0:29:18.1 Sydnee: I did.
0:29:18.2 Jared: That giant N1 Education bootcamp. And the same thing happened because you experienced the same kind of things, didn't you?
0:29:25.9 Sydnee: Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. There were definitely moments that I felt like I didn't belong there and that I didn't know what I was doing. And even like my own sabotage came in and tried to knock me down. But you just have to keep correct. When you have that behavior of that old identity, you gotta knock it out right then and have that positive self-talk that, Yep, you can do it. And I did it and it was fricking hard. But I am super proud of myself. [laughter]
0:29:53.2 Jared: I love it. Tori, whenever you notice some old self stuff starting to slide in, 'cause we talk about sabotage and drifting a lot. How have you been able to combat that whenever those old feelings of restriction wanna come back or the old thoughts of old ways of doing things? How have you been able to combat that?
0:30:10.5 Tori: It's tough 'cause I still I still have moments where I'm not super motivated. I still have moments where I do think about oh, I kind of I don't wanna eat that tonight. Or I kind of ate something a little big earlier and I don't wanna go out tonight. I still have moments like that sometimes. And I just keep telling myself what you're doing right now, you're seeing results, you're feeling better, so keep doing it. Don't go back to those old habits because you've never felt better and you've never been better. So it just thinking about like old me and just doing all the things that I used to do and thinking about how I used to feel, it just doesn't make sense to go backwards and to think about those things anymore. It just makes sense to ignore it and just keep going. You know? It's just, it doesn't make, it's just not logical to me anymore. It's not.
0:30:57.1 Tori: Yeah. No, absolutely. I love that so much. 'Cause that's the thing is, one of the best ways to fight emotion is with logic, but then you're comparing identities and then the repercussions or results from each of the identities. And you say, well, which version supports the things I want? Well, what happens if I go be the old version? What happens with that? And I think that's one of the most brilliant ways to make any decision.
0:31:17.8 Sydnee: Yeah, definitely.
0:31:21.8 Tori: Let me ask you this for you, Tori. One of my favorite questions to ask is when it comes to like actually pulling the trigger and investing in yourself. Because the thing is everyone's serious until it's time to put their money where their mouth is. Everyone's oh, I'm in this until it's here's my credit card. So for you, when it came time to like pull the fucking trigger, was there hesitation for you when it came to putting money where your mouth was? 'cause only people who pay attention. I'm sorry. People pay. Wait, I'm sorry. I keep messing up. Only people who pay pay attention. There we go. So for you, was there hesitation around that? About ah.
0:31:57.5 Tori: There was, there definitely was. At first I was like, honestly, not as much as I thought though. I was hesitant, but I kind of just, I wanted to change so badly. I just wanted it so bad. And everything I've done prior just did not work. It didn't work. I've tried so many things and I was not happy. And I was this is my thing where I just... I wanna do this for myself. So I feel like I couldn't put a price on that, or I couldn't... To invest in myself in something that I want so badly. I was I'm gonna do it. [laughter] I was I'm gonna do it. And I just, I did it and here I am. [laughter]
0:32:33.1 Jared: I love it. And well that, I always like to talk about that because so many people fight all the reasons to not invest in themselves. 'cause it's oh, money's always tight, or life is always crazy or it's uncomfortable. And so I I'm always curious for everyone who does it and just has this kind of result happen. What was the thing that made you overcome that was for you? Was it just purely logical of, oh no, I want this, so therefore I'm willing to pay for it? Or was it deeper than that?
0:33:00.7 Tori: It was deeper than that. So I was in no position to make any big payments. Like I was, I'm in debt, like I'm a student. So I was a student, like I just graduated college. Like I have loans to pay. I was, I'm in no position to do that, but I was I need to be happy. I wanna change so badly and I want my mindset. And it was the mindset, I was like, I need it. I can fix myself, fix my body and all that. But what about my mindset? I was just so not in a healthy place with food or confidence and anything like that. So I was I need my mind to change and I need to just, I need to invest in myself to do that. I need to fix it because if it's not, then I'm just gonna be miserable forever.
0:33:40.9 Jared: Yeah. How, how old are you? Remind me how old you are?
0:33:44.0 Tori: 24.
0:33:46.3 Jared: See that makes me so happy. 'Cause could you imagine waiting till you're in your 40s or 50s, but things have just... You be stuck, and things have just gotten worse. Could you have fathomed that?
0:34:00.2 Tori: No. It's so crazy. And I think about that all the time, actually. I'm like, what if I never did this? One, I would have gained my weight back from Weight Watchers 100%. Two, I would continue to be unhappy and go back and forth with dieting or cheat days. No cheat days. Restricting. Not restricting. It was just I think about how this experience I'm set for life now, that's when I made the purchase and I invested in myself, I was like, you know what? This is knowledge for life, and this is things that I'm going to have forever. So it's just worth it. It's worth it. It's for my life. It's crazy. How can you deny it?
0:34:42.1 Jared: I love that you said that, because that's truly what doing this the right way is about, is setting you up for life. We think about that with everything else. You get a good job to set you up for life. You put your money in a 401k to set you up for life. You find a really good partner, get married, have kids to set you up for life. But most people aren't setting themselves up for life. And then we find out 10 years, 20, 30 years later, we're not just in the same spot, because things are either getting positive momentum or negative momentum. And then we have, like you think sabotage and drifting is bad now. Imagine if we put 10 more years of struggle and failure, 20 more years of struggle and failure, 30 more pounds, 50 more pounds, 100 more pounds, and you're in your 50s and 60s then now you're just trying to get that started. This is why the best time to do this for everyone listening to fix your shit is it's like a treat. 20 years ago was the best time. The next best time is right now because it's just going to get worse the longer we wait.
0:35:43.3 Tori: Yeah, definitely.
0:35:44.6 Jared: Your 30 year old self 35, 40 year old self is like, thank fucking God, right?
0:35:52.4 Tori: It's so wild.
0:35:55.5 Jared: Yeah, I love it. I'm curious. So for you, if you don't mind me asking, what was the biggest driving force behind you wanting to change yourself? Was it purely aesthetic? I know it wasn't. Not that pure aesthetics are bad, but for you, what was the big driving force for you wanting to change?
0:36:14.4 Tori: I think it was for me, it was probably confidence. I just had such low confidence, and I just knew it was because, yes, I didn't look the best I knew I could look better, but it was so much deeper than that. I wanted something that... I don't know, I just wanted, like, a purpose. I wanted something to drive me and to do every day that I knew was benefiting myself. I never had anything where it was for me or doing something for myself. I never had something like that. And I finally do. So even just going to the gym and knowing that I'm doing something for myself and this is benefiting me, not anybody else, it's benefiting me. That's huge for me. So that's my thing.
0:36:56.1 Jared: To be honest, that's also that undeniable proof. That's why this builds so much confidence. Yeah, it helps that you're looking better and feeling better, but it's because in your actions, you're proving to yourself you're worth investing in and showing up for. It'd be like, imagine if I told my wife, I said I love you, but I treated her like shit. You're not just saying, yes, I'm good enough, I'm worth it. If we look at your bank account, if we look at the hours you spend in the day and where you put your focus, it's proving to yourself that you are worth showing up for. And that's why it's making all these changes. So this is why for most people listening who feel like shit, it doesn't help that they hate the way they look and feel, but it's because their actions to themselves are bad. They say they'll start something and they don't. They say, I'll start over Monday, and they don't. They say, this is it for me. And it's not.
0:37:48.1 Tori: Yeah, this is the longest I've ever been consistent with anything. And that alone makes me so proud of myself and so happy that I'm just doing something constantly for myself and never not doing it like I'm always doing it. So it's pretty awesome.
0:38:03.6 Jared: Sydnee, it looks like Sydnee, are you tearing up right now?
0:38:06.2 Sydnee: Yes.
[laughter]
0:38:13.1 Jared: I'm curious, Sydnee, why do you think Tori's been so successful? You've been the one in the trenches with her. Why has she been successful? I don't want to say. This is when our clients do their fucking shit, this happens. Like, one plus one is always two, she's done the shit and it's why she's crushing. But Sydnee, from your perspective, why has she been so successful?
0:38:37.9 Sydnee: I think because she just has been able to take that fear out of her identity and just do just like, okay, we're doing the damn thing. If you tell me to get on the scale, I'm going to get on the scale. If you tell me to eat these calories, I'm going to eat these calories. So I think just committing and just taking that fear out and being stronger than her fear made her really successful.
0:39:05.3 Jared: I love that. I think it's ironic. I have this love hate relationship with cliche quotes. It's like, part of me is like, Yes, but then part of me is like, it's corny as fuck and everyone says it, but coaching people over the last eleven years has really shown me that. The old quote of the cave you fear to enter holds the treasure that you seek. And it's never been more true. You're scared to weigh yourself. We got to start weighing every day. You're scared of pasta and cheese. Sorry about you. The first world problems. You're eating the pasta and cheese. You're scared to eat more calories. We got to raise those calories. You're scared to go to the big boy gym. It's time to go make friends with some meatheads. You know what I mean?
0:39:44.9 Jared: And then this is what happens on the other side. This is the cave you fear to enter holds a treasure that you seek. And it's true every time.
0:39:52.2 Tori: It's so true. It's just doing the things that make me scared, make me not scared. It's weird, but it's true. It's what happened.
0:40:00.0 Sydnee: Your comfort zone is growing. But then also with your check ins, too, being super super detailed and letting me know everything that was going on. So if she was feeling nervous or feeling discouraged or feeling however she was feeling, she wasn't holding back or afraid or ashamed to tell me anything. So having that really good relationship back and forth really helped too. For sure.
0:40:24.7 Jared: Because obviously hundreds of thousands of people listen to this. And so the majority of people aren't working with someone. But I think that's a reason why most people fail is they're not honest with themselves, right? When we coach people, luckily, when people invest in themselves and have accountability, most people are honest, but we still get every now and then the person that blatantly lies on a check in, which still baffles my mind, but like I was saying, Tori, you've been undeniably honest about everything. And I think the reason most people struggle is because they're lying to themselves. They're like, oh, I'm an all or nothing person, because they're validating a bad decision. Or they go, Well, I'm doing my best and they're not. Or like, Well, I'm tracking my calories and they're estimating their calories or whatever it is. So how do you feel about that?
0:41:10.1 Tori: It's just I know that if I lie, it's not going to get me anywhere. If I exaggerate, it's not going to get me anywhere. So just telling the complete truth. I want this to work. I want it to work so badly and I want it to benefit me. So what's the point in not sharing literally every single detail? I leave Sydnee bullet points, I go like, just sharing everything is what helps.
0:41:33.5 Sydnee: Jared knows I love the bullet points.
0:41:39.1 Jared: I love it. I'm curious. You may not have an answer to this in either way. It's totally fine. What's next for you? Because here's the reason. Let me preface it with this. Too often, most people we work with, they have been captive by this diet culture bullshit that they've been so obsessed with weight loss, weight loss, weight loss now that they've never thought about what's going to happen when I don't struggle anymore, what do I want to do? I'm free. My mental space is clear. What's next for you since you've achieved all of this, your bandwidth is back. You have all this unlimited stuff now on the other side. So what's next for you?
0:42:16.7 Tori: I just have so much gratitude and I'm just grateful for this state that I'm in. So I feel like just keep going because just maintaining everything and just constantly trying to improve and just I don't know. That's a tough one, but I definitely think I just want to maintain everything and just constantly push myself and not go back to those fears. I just want to keep going and constantly, constantly improving myself.
0:42:42.7 Jared: That's incredible. That wasn't in my notes. I'm just like, oh, let's ask this. That's literally how half my interviews, I'll have some bad motherfuckers that I'm secretly intimidated and shaking and I don't even use half my notes. I'm like, hey, I just thought of this. And I'll ask a weird question. So I can't imagine how many times my producer probably is editing this and he's just like, that motherfucker. Why did he say that? Let me ask you this. What would you say to the people listening that are where you were?
0:43:16.9 Tori: Eat more food. That's my thing. No, really, don't be afraid of food. Eat your food even when you're not motivated. Go to the gym. Because I have moments where I just don't want to go. I don't want to do it, but just make it a habit. Keep going even when you don't want to go and you'll be so happy after. Like, that's my thing. Just keep doing it when you don't want to. That's my motto.
0:43:41.1 Jared: Sydnee, what would you say other than that t0 people who are where she?
0:43:46.6 Sydnee: I think really, really don't let that fear hold you back. Think about where you want to be and then how are you going to get there? You're never going to get there eating 1200 calories. You're never going to have any muscles doing that. So if your goal is that you want to have muscles and you want to enjoy life and you don't want to be angry and tired and all of the things, we've got to eat the food, we got to lift heavy and do it even when we don't want to. Make decisions today that tomorrow you is going to be proud of.
0:44:23.4 Jared: Yeah, absolutely. I love it. Final question. What would you say to those... Wow, I just dropped my pin and just threw it at my mic. That's cool. What would you say to people who are on the edge of whether to really go all in on themselves in coaching or not? What would your thoughts be for people that are just like on the edge?
0:44:42.8 Tori: I would say, how bad do you really want it? Because I feel like sometimes people are on the cusp because they don't truly... Not that they don't want to change their lives, they just don't want to put that effort into actually changing their lives. You really got to just do it. You got to do the work. It's not easy because then everyone would be doing it.
0:45:04.9 Jared: Every day, I'm fully convinced that most people think it would be nice to have the goals that they want. They don't actually want them otherwise actions would change, otherwise patterns would change. But I think most people think it would be nice to have that over there, but they don't actually want it bad enough to change their situation. And you just did. You said, no, my situation sucks ass and it's costing me a lot and I'm worth it. So let's do it. So that's awesome.
0:45:32.2 Tori: Yeah.
0:45:32.6 Jared: Fuck. I can't believe it's been almost 45 minutes already. Girls, this has been amazing. I know it. I appreciate the fuck out of both of you. Thank you both for doing this. It means a ton. I know it's going to help thousands of people, so no pressure, but... Well it's over, so... it's going to help a lot of people, so, yeah, I appreciate it. Thank you, both of you guys.
0:45:55.1 Sydnee: Of course.
0:45:55.2 Tori: Of course. Thank you.
0:45:58.0 Jared: And we are back. Thank you so much for tuning in again to today's episode of the show. It means a ton. I know if you stuck around this long that you got a lot of value out of it. So be sure and take what Tori talked about and Sydnee talked about and go run with it and change your life.
0:46:11.8 Jared: Now, if you're listening to this and you're in the similar shoes Tori was in, where she just finished Weight Watchers and she's like, I have no idea how to keep this weight off or you've been on this journey more than you've been off it. You're always on a diet, off a diet, always trying and failing and all this stuff. And if you want to have an experience just like Tori's, this is exactly why we coach people. It's why we can find all these people, meet them where they're at, meet you where you're at and take you from where you're at to where you want to be in the most seamless experience possible so we can end the struggle. My big claim to fame is I will help you never struggle losing weight ever again. I will help you never struggle losing weight ever again. Wow. If I could get my words right. That's what we're talking about here. This is not about just losing weight. Yes, that's part of it. But what's more important to me is not just giving you results, but he's giving you also skill sets that match those results so you can go never struggle ever again. This is your last stop. This is Tori's last stop. So if you want to have a story just like Tori's, you should absolutely hit the link below apply for coaching.
0:47:13.0 Jared: There's a special link down in the description because you're coming from the show that's going to take you to the front of the line with the people that are applying for coaching because you have a special place in my heart because you're coming from the podcast. So if that's you absolutely apply for coaching. Apparently I can't talk today, but if that's you, you should absolutely apply for coaching to see if we can help you a little bit more. And if we can't, we'll point you in the right direction to someone who can. And that's it. That's it for today's episode. If you are not and also, we have some other stuff in the description as well. If you want my free course, it's down there. If you want to join my free Facebook group to have a community around you, it's there.
0:47:44.6 Jared: Be sure to subscribe to the show. That way, you know whenever more episodes are coming out. But, yeah, that's it. I appreciate you being here. Thank you so much. I love you and I will talk to you next time.
About Tori:
Prior to coaching, Tori was a grad student. She put her schoolwork first and neglected her physical health and diet.
Tori has always been a small person, standing at just 5’ 2” tall, and weight had never been a concern for her, but after grad school, she had reached her heaviest weight of 152 pounds.
Tori decided to go on Weight Watchers and started going to the gym. She did lose 20 lbs, but was constantly sore and had very little energy. She decided to stop doing Weight Watchers but quickly realized that she had no idea how to keep the weight off.
She had been following Jared for some time and decided to sign up for coaching.
Sydnee’s Approach with Tori:
When Tori first started with Sydnee, she was afraid to eat more. Because of this, Sydnee started a little slower with Tori, but over time they were able to gradually increase her calories from 1200 to 1900.
Tori is also now consistently eating over 100 grams of protein daily compared to just 50 grams a day prior to coaching.
Since working with Sydnee, Tori has lost inches while maintaining her weight of 132 pounds.
Tori was also very afraid of the scale when she first started coaching, but she learned by weighing herself every day that the scale fluctuates for all kinds of reasons—and that fat gain doesn’t happen overnight.
Overcoming The Fear of Eating More:
Tori was scared of eating more because she thought she would gain weight.
Additionally, she was specifically afraid of eating certain foods that she really loved—like pasta and cheese—because she again thought that those foods would inherently lead to weight gain.
Tori’s fears came from a lack of understanding about food and the body. She did not know that her 1200-calorie diet contributed to her exhaustion and that she actually needed to eat more.
Now, Tori is looking better and feeling better and eating more than she ever thought possible.
Eating more stopped becoming scary when she started seeing results while eating the food she enjoyed.
She simply stuck to her calories, made sure she was hitting her protein goal, and kept following the advice of her coach.
“It almost feels too easy,” something that Tori struggled with in the beginning.
She continues to say, “I'm eating so much food. I'm eating what I love. I have snacks before bed every night. Sometimes I have a Pop-Tart. Life is good now.”
The Most Impactful Part of Tori’s Journey:
For Tori, repairing her relationship with food has been by far the most impactful part of the journey.
Previously, Tori would avoid going out with friends and would get nervous if she did go out.
She would get really upset with herself if she went out with friends on a Friday night and either spend her entire weekend thinking about it, or she would go off the rails and then “start over on Monday.”
Now, after coaching, Tori is able to simply go out and enjoy time with friends without fear or guilt.
She just goes out, has a meal at a restaurant she loves, and is back on track the next day—something she was never able to do before.
Tori’s Progress and Mental Shift:
Sydnee saw a real shift in Tori around the third or fourth set of progress photos, when Tori express frustration that she wasn’t making any progress, but Sydnee pointed out the muscle gain she’d had.
Once Tori was able to recognize that the food she was eating was helping her, she truly went all in.
Tori sometimes can’t even believe that the muscle she has gained is a part of her body. She’s never really gained muscle previously so these changes have been very exciting for her.
She has also noticed that she has so much more energy and she recovers much more quickly.
Previously, she would be sore for 5 days after a workout, but now if she is sore, it’s usually only for 1 day.
Tori had followed Jared for about a year before signing up for coaching, while she was doing Weight Watchers, but she never thought that the methods could work for her.
She would see the progress of other clients and think, “That could never be me.” She could never have imagined that she would progress so much through coaching.
Why Tori Signed Up For Coaching:
Tori had gotten to the point where she was tired of restricting and tired of not being able to eat the things she wanted. Before coaching, her relationship with food was horrible and food gave her anxiety.
She didn’t like food and she was unable to enjoy a meal. She was wrapped up in thinking about what she was eating, when she was eating, and a ton of things surrounding food that really didn’t matter.
How Sydnee Worked Through Tori’s Fears:
There were a lot of signs pointing to the fact that Tori needed to eat more food—like her lack of energy and struggles in the gym.
Again, because of her fears and anxiety surrounding eating, Sydnee worked Tori’s calories up slowly and along the way pointed out how Tori was progressing—and how her energy was increasing.
Sydnee and Tori also talked about nutrition and calories and how a calorie is different from a nutrient.
Recently, Tori was going home for a weekend and was nervous about not tracking her food, but she just embraced the experience and when she got back from her trip, she got back on track, the scale went back to normal, and everything was fine.
Sydnee points out that these moments prove to your brain that nothing bad is going to happen and you can maintain your healthy, balanced lifestyle.
Jared emphasizes that this is the essence of Dieting From The Inside Out. You have to get your brain to experience doing these things—while getting results—to build irrefutable proof, because once your brain is fully bought in, everything else is a breeze.
Sydnee’s favorite moments come when it’s not her who has to push Tori, but Tori pushing herself and getting herself out of her comfort zone—like when she decided to change gyms to take her training more seriously.
Dealing With The Old Self:
When thoughts of or the desire to want to restrict creep in, Tori reminds herself that she is feeling better and seeing results. Thinking about how she feels and how she used to feel when she was on a restricted calorie diet helps her see that it makes no sense to revert back to her old ways.
It’s no longer logical to her to revert to her old self.
What Made Tori Invest In Herself:
There was some initial hesitation for Tori to make the investment, but she had tried so many things previously and she wanted to change—and ultimately felt that changing for herself wasn’t something that she could really put a price on.
Tori knew that she needed to change her mindset and that, while she could lose weight, she needed to invest in herself now so she could be happy.
She knew that by signing up for coaching she was gaining knowledge for life and she truly feels as though she is set up for long-term success.
Jared emphasizes that right now is the best time to get started.
If Tori had waited 10, 20, or 30 years, things would have only regressed. Even if you have already waited decades to change, now is still the best time.
The main driving force for Tori was confidence. She had low self-confidence and she wanted to do something for herself that would benefit her.
Jared points out that where you spend your time and money speaks volumes about where your focus is, and that by investing in yourself you are proving to yourself that you are worth showing up for.
What Has Made Tori So Successful:
Sydnee believes that Tori’s success comes from her ability to take the fear out of her identity and just do. She has been stronger than her fear and has been committed to eating the calories, weighing herself, and making changes.
Tori has also been very detailed and transparent during check-ins—and that open communication has made a big impact.
Jared finds that many people lie to themselves—they say they are tracking their calories, but really they are estimating their calories. Tori went into this knowing that she needed to be honest—because lying to herself or Sydnee wouldn’t get her anywhere.
What’s Next For Tori and Closing Thoughts:
Tori plans to keep going, maintaining, and improving from here. She has an immense amount of gratitude for how far she has come and wants to continue growing.
Her advice to listeners is to not be afraid to eat more food, go to the gym, and keep going—even when you might not want to.
Sydnee says to not let fear hold you back—think about where you want to be and how you’ll get there. Make decisions today that tomorrow you is going to be proud of.
Tori says that if you are on the cusp, think about how badly you really want it—and be willing to put in the work.
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